


Be Brave Usopp

by DrizzlyMango



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blind Character, Blind Usopp, Canon-Typical Violence, Disabled Character, Domestic Fluff, Fear, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, I still hate tags, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Not Beta Read, Past Child Abuse, Slow Burn, Trying something new, low vision
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:40:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28623453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrizzlyMango/pseuds/DrizzlyMango
Summary: Usopp's journey has been anything but average. His father's parting gift was a skill that could change his life. In a world not kind to people like him he learns that weaknesses can be your greatest strength.
Relationships: Usopp/Vinsmoke Sanji
Comments: 7
Kudos: 76





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I have a lot of ideas for this and haven't really decided where in the timeline I'll be stopping this story. But this is something I've had in the works for a while. Please kudos or comment. I treasure each and every one, even if I suck at responding to them.
> 
> This isn't beta-read so I'm sorry in advance.
> 
> DM UPDATE: Autocorrect is the bane of my existence so I'm really sorry about that. I edited the chapter a bit to fix somethings that sounded awkward and to fix some content mistakes, and of course spelling and punctuation.

Syrup Village was a safe haven. There were no immediate threats which demanded attention, just a peaceful island stuck in a never-ending spring. Usopp grinned as he looked out towards the rolling hills, the faintest of memories of his father pushing in around him. He was a child when his father had taken him into the field to learn how to shoot. Usopp knew that his father was a well known marksman, the best in the East Blue, maybe even the whole Grandline. He knew that his father couldn’t stay, at least for long because he was a Pirate. Yassop had taken pride in Usopp, determined to help him carve out a place for himself. He’d told him that the world would be against him at every turn. That he’d have to be brave and fight to stand on equal footing. So Yasopp had instilled the basics of Observation Haki into his son early. Anything to give him a chance to face the world, to be prepared to take it by storm. 

_“Be Brave Usopp,”_

His father’s words stoked a flame deep within him. He burned to prove to the world, disability or not he was just as capable, if not more so, of being a warrior of the sea. He was just as capable of becoming what he dreamed to be. 

Usopp had never really appreciated those fleeting moments with his father. Usopp dreamed of the open ocean, yearning to explore the world and become a brave warrior of the sea. He’d spent his days practicing and training, cursing the small obstacles that lay in his path. 

It was Kaya, sweet Kaya, who had broken it down for him. She was studying medicine to be a doctor after all. Unfortunately her own health was fragile and she was often bed-ridden as a result, which she had devoted to listening to Usopp's stories and studying. He supposed that it was her way of trying to help those who were looked down upon based on their ailments, visible or invisible. He was fully blind in his right eye, and his left had retinal damage that left him seeing a smattering of light and a blur of colors, no real clarity at all. He’d heard that there had been some complications with his mother’s pregnancy which had left him with low vision. Kaya had taken it upon herself to stand in and become the doctor their small village needed, one that would be better equipped to catch such issues earlier. 

Sometimes it bothered him that he couldn’t make out fine details, that he stumbled over things that weren’t entirely clear, that he couldn’t read the way most people do, but those were as much his strengths as his weaknesses. 

He had a reputation in Syrup VIllage for being a liar and exaggerating. He knew it had worsened after his mother's passing, but it only made him miss his father that much more. He still trained his Haki, still agonized over perfecting his aim and the distance at which he could shoot. He knew that without it he’d have no chance at becoming a sniper. Secretly he wished to have that perfect vision, to see the small flickering flame of a match from across a field. But his father had thought ahead and given him the gift of sight, albeit through his other senses. 

Usopp knew he could do anything he set his mind to. 

Seeing the blurry figures of three strangers, pirates, approaching the village had thrown him for a loop. Apparently they were after a ship. He’d tried his best to scare them off with his tale of the thousands of followers he had, but they seemed unaffected by it. The trio proceeded to the village unhindered. 

They’d stopped at the local tavern for something to eat while they inquired further about procuring a ship and Usopp had decided to try and observe from a distance. He’d sent his loyal followers in to gauge the threat they all posed. 

From his brief interaction with them earlier he’d deduced that they’re all memorable. There was a boy with a yellow hat, that smelled faint of straw and the sea, and a little bit like the feeling of the sun warming his skin. A green haired man, a swordsman or samurai of some sort, with what he assumed were swords based on the slight metallic tang in the air around him. The girl had bright orange, red maybe, hair and smelled of tangerines and a bit like the paper notes the government had issued. 

He grimaced at the thought of money. He knew that people took advantage of him, if he presented them with the wrong notes. He did, very rarely were they truly honest. Kaya and his crew had all taken to protecting him that way. 

He shook himself from his thoughts and continued on. The pirates were interesting, not your conventional pirates by any means but the red captain knew him. Usopp knew he didn’t recognize the boy's voice nor his slight accent. He’d learned from speaking to enough "off-islanders” that each island despite the government's attempts to instill a uniform language couldn’t seem to lose the slight dialects and accents from each sea and their respective islands. 

The captain knew Yassop and apparently, and by extension knew a lot of Usopp. What he never mentioned was his sight. Usopp wasn’t sure if it was something his father had shared. He knew that in the short time he spent at Syrup Village he had been proud of his son’s blindness, but deep down he’s always wondered if he was a disappointment. If his father despised his disabled son, and had left because he wanted to be rid of him.

However, the captain, Luffy, spoke to him like he was a long lost friend. He didn’t treat him differently because of his disability, for once in his life Usopp had the chance to be normal, to be seen as just another guy without the stigmas attached. He knew that if he followed his heart down the path it was tugging him the crew would learn eventually but if he could have some semblance of being normal he’d take it. If he had any chance to stand as an equal, to be a pirate, he thought that was pretty brave. 

He spent a lot of time just talking with the crew, doing his best to direct his gaze like Kaya had taught him too. This was a shot at his dream. He knew that it would take time, that there’d be innumerable obstacles but, he left himself a dream. 

The pirate crew had helped him defeat Captain Kuro and save Kaya, and for that he was incredibly thankful. She was like their village princess, and the island would fall apart without her. He knew that in the fight he’d misjudged the distance a couple of times a little too much to the left or the right for his taste, but that was one of the largest fights he’d been in. The amount of focus and planning threw him off guard. Trying to gauge his surroundings enough to make those calls was something he knew he’d have to work on. 

It wasn’t until a conversation with Kaya in the middle of the night that he really found it in himself to be brave. It was harder at night to navigate his way through the trees and brush. He let himself trace the bark of the tree, let himself linger and really absorb the world around him. He tried to commit the sensation to memory. 

He needed to borrow some of Kaya’s faith in him, to step off the precipice and embrace the freedom that came with it. Joining the crew would give him a fresh start. It would allow him to leave the chains behind and really live. 

He took a deep breath. 

_“Be Brave Usopp”_

The Going Merry drifted along the seas, Usopp doing his best to navigate as he was told, once again for Kaya's brutal lessons. She was the one that taught him the parts of the ship and how to orient himself. Aside from Luffy’s awful painting job of a Jolly Roger which had Usopp biting his tongue from stating that even blind he could do better than that. He did, however, paint a new flag for them, though precision wasn’t exact and it hurt his head from trying he was proud to have left his mark. Back on his island he’d picked up art as a habit, claiming his style was more abstract and the colors bold and blocky. He knew it likely wasn’t great but he’d been painting since before his mother’s passing so he felt fairly confident in his skills. Unsurprisingly there was more than enough time to practice on observing and adapting to life aboard the ship. He let himself fall into the familiar habit of counting. When he was younger he adopted a counting method to gauge his surroundings until he was more comfortable. Twenty steps until the kitchen, eleven steps on the stairs, and so on. 

Usopp let himself be persuaded by Luffy to engage with the Merry’s defenses. His attention trying to shift its focus from his immediate vicinity to a greater distance. He’d heard rumors of the scope of observation haki stretching on and on, but his range was only several yards, the rest up tp luck. He eventually hoped to work his scope up to a couple of miles at least. He knew that as a self-proclaimed sniper he’d have to work hard to keep his word. Sadly, he didn’t have much experience beyond that of Syrup Village’s mild temperament. 

The need for a cook pressed in on the crew, especially as Johnny and Yosaku joined them. Apparently they were close with Zoro. Usopp honestly couldn’t tell them apart but knew that the pair near worshiped their friend. 

The air shifted as they got closer to the Baratie. He could feel a headache settling between his brows as they drew nearer. He never allowed himself to use haki for such extended periods of time. Part of him, a small pebble of self-doubt tumbled through the torrent of his desire for excitement. Part of him dreamed to live up to his fathers expectations. He felt it, a bone deep all knowing sensation that this was his family. This was the crew that would see him for who he is, disability or not. 

As they made their way onto the floating restaurant, Usopp found himself leaning heavily on Zoro, playing it off as not being used to sea travel yet. In all honesty the sensation of the restaurant was similar to being on Merry, but with the added stress of not knowing his surroundings. Usopp had lost track of his steps as many people spoke to them. It was a sensory overload trying to filter out stimuli. Zoro’s firm grasp on his arm helped him to find his way to the table. 

Their meal had been pleasant, enjoyable even, and they had met a cook as good as the owner. Usopp didn’t have the words to describe him. Stubborn, sure, but something about the cook left Usopp wanting to know more. The way he walked like he was self assured but the slight shuffling-click of his polished shoes on the floor made Usopp believe he was hiding something more. His attitude towards women versus that of men. It was something he wasn’t entirely sure how to handle. Sanji was a perfect package of paradoxes, and Usopp felt intoxicated by it. 

Luffy’s aim to find a cook and his initial damage to the restaurant took him out of the game for a bit, but left time for Usopp to really get to know his other crew members. From what he knew they’d been together made a week prior to them landing on his island. How they’d all met still confused Usopp but the flash of blinding white told him Zoro was amused. The way Nami’s form tilted alerted him to the fondness growing on her as well. Having a crew was something he was thrilled about. Still, he wondered if he was making a mistake by not telling any of them about his eyes. He had ways to compensate but it would take time to adjust and to improve. Usopp supposed each of them would be working towards different goals regardless of how passionate Zoro was about becoming the greatest swordsman. It seemed like he lived and breathed for it. Nami had a sharpness to her that told Usopp she’d been hurt before and that it was as much a front as it was protection. 

The conflict aboard this ship didn’t surprise Usopp as much as he figured it should have. Something about the way that Gin guy had acted made him suspicious. Usopp has always erred on the side of caution and been overly critical of things. He found that if you were naturally more pessimistic, then you would be pleasantly surprised if you were wrong or you're able to predict correctly. Being negative would be a valuable skill, he hoped. 

While the drama with the Cooks was unfolding, Zoro had gone chasing his dream. For whatever reason, something otherworldly had aligned just so, and Dracule Mihawk, the greatest Swordsman in the world, had made his way to this part of the East Blue. It was unnerving to see a flickering dot of gold, there and gone in a flash, as the man’s gaze swept over them. Usopp recognized the terrifying presence as having something to do with another type of Haki, his father had said that his own captain had such an overwhelming presence. 

Zoro challenged the swordsman and was lucky to have his organs remain within his body even from this distance and with his poor vision he could tell that was too much red to be safe. Luffy and the cook were both fighting and giving it their all against the crew. 

He settled into himself and tried to think of a way he could help. Limitations be damned there had to be something he could do. He saw the cooks fighting and had an idea. 

_“Be brave Usopp”_

Usopp had gone with Johnny and Zoro to find Nami. The Merry was one of the only things he had that reminded him of his home as silly as it seemed. He knew that the Merry was just like him, part of the crew despite its limitations. Having the ship so far away left something unpleasant churning inside of him, not just because he was in yet another unfamiliar location. The others were on their way but even now, the damage by the fishmen ran deep. The fear and oppression permeated deep beneath the surface of Cocoyashi. He hated when he was right. Hurt didn’t even begin to cover what the fishmen had done to Nami and her village. 

Usopp tried his best to keep his attention and use his observational haki sparingly while casting it out enough that he could detect the looming presence of the Fishmen. What he wasn’t prepared for was Zoro to end up missing. That was not part of their unspoken plan. Bitterly, Usopp thought that he at least had an excuse for getting himself lost. He thought it would be common sense to avoid any unnecessary attention to themselves and just keep searching for Nami. 

He also wasn’t anticipating for Nami to pretend to murder him. He spent too long trying to find the others. The island was different from anything he’d seen before so his usual tactics weren’t working. Keeping a low profile wasn’t easy, especially when it came to recalling faces. Everything was blurry to him, just vague blobs of dull colors, but the experience was like stepping into a still puddle and finding out it went deep. 

The faint sound of bickering and a low rumbling voice sounded a lot like Zoro caught his attention, so he kept ambling towards it. What he wasn’t anticipating was to get caught in the middle of a fight between Zoro and Sanji. He felt himself collapse as the pain registered, he’d have to make a note to his future self to not get between the pair, especially not with such a disadvantage. Proper depth perception was for the weak. It took ages to explain that Nami faked his death by stabbing herself. He would have been carrion if Arlong had been the one to do it. They all knew that. 

Hearing Nami’s background just broke his heart even more. He could tell that Sanji was similarly affected. Zoro seemed too still to be listening but Usopp couldn’t be sure. He caught Sanji glancing at him, he did his best to ignore it but when he asked Sanji what was wrong the cook just shook his head saying nothing. 

He told himself after the fact that he had been brave. Probably not as much as Nami, or Luffy for taking on Arlong, but he was thankful for the commentary throughout the battle. It hurt his pride a little to have to rely on bystander's narrations to put things together. He found himself idling in the kitchen, he rested his chin in his hands, and his elbows on the table as Sanji busied himself in the kitchen. Zoro was somewhere on the deck, Nami taking the time in her quarters on the ship. Usopp knew that she needed time, he knew how she felt leaving her home. They all did. Luffy was prodding a sleeping Zoro, after being thrown out of the kitchen by Sanji. 

The white noise of Sanji cooking lulled Usopp into a semi-conscious state. He was exhausted. He’d been relying on his haki more and more since setting out and couldn’t imagine how much different his experience would be if he hadn’t been able to master that method of sensing his surroundings. Of course at the present it just picked up larger energies, but he knew from what his father had said that the true masters of it could detect even the smallest ant across great distances. 

The clink of a bowl on wood startled him out of his thoughts. He blinked through a brief panic before relaxing. He was on the ship, he was safe. But it was hard to go against the instincts, that fight or flight, mostly flight, response when someone passes too close into his bubble without his conscious awareness. 

Sanji was speaking to him in a hushed tone, like trying to soothe a crying child. 

Usopp shook his head and sighed, “I’m sorry, I was lost in my head for a bit,”

Sanji hummed in acknowledgement standing a short distance away, waiting for Usopp to begin eating. 

“It’s hard,” Sanji started, “To ignore the reflexive response to people getting too close. I get it,” 

Usopp froze. Did Sanji know? What was he talking about? What was-

“I won’t tell anyone,” He said softly. “But I’m starting to think most of us aboard this ship have seen some sort of abuse,” 

Usopp choked around the spoonful of soup. 

“No no no no no no, it’s nothing like that I promise,” Although he tried to block out some of the meaner villagers coming to mind, “but I agree, if you ever need someone to talk about I’m all ears,” he bit back the comment about not being all eyes, but only just. 

“Thanks, I’ll remember that,” Sanji said thickly.

It wasn’t until after the whole Loguetown incident that Usopp realized he might have bit off more than he could chew. He’d said that he would be there for his crew, that if they ever needed to talk to come to him. He’d said he could find a story to tell for anyone and any occasion but also that the Great Captain Usopp was the best listener. If he was feeling extra generous he’d even be willing to throw in a bit of advice. 

So here he was, regretting his night's watch position because, aside from his embarrassing attempt to ascend and descend the rigging, he couldn’t see for shit. He’d definitely be useless until an enemy got too close. If he used his haki, the range was still minimal, but he’d spend the rest of the day nursing a migraine. He’s realized that Luffy offers to take some of his watches, and that his role in the rotation is just as infrequent as Nami’s, but it leaves him feeling guilty. 

If he could just be honest and tell everyone then he’d be fine and would save himself the trouble, and possibly avoid dangerous situations that put everyone at risk. 

The shifting and groaning of the rigging alerted him to the presence of another so he was able to reign in his yelp. A small squeak of surprise still slipped past despite his best efforts as a dark figure dropped into the crows nest next to him. 

“Jeez, some watch dog you are,” Sanji said but it was all teasing. 

“I wasn’t expecting anyone that's all,”

He heard Sanji pause, before the figure moved closer to him. 

“Ummm, Usopp I’m over here,” He said quietly. 

Usopp wanted to scream. He could have sworn that blur was Sanji but- 

“I was wondering if that offer to lend an ear still held.” 

Before he could stop himself he said, “Only if you’ll be my eyes.” 

Sanji once again froze, lighter in hand. “Sure,” 

The sparking sound of the lighter igniting and the gentle puff of air Sanji let out as he lit the cigarette were the only sounds in the quiet night. Even the sea seemed to be sleeping. 

“So, what’s on your mind,” Usopp asked, thankful for the slight blur of Sanji’s lit cigarette even being the barest hint of a smudge in the dark was enough of a reference to keep his eyes trained on Sanji. 

“Do you ever just feel like you’re living a nightmare?” Sanji began. “It’s nothing got to do with the crew, but part of me wonders if I’m really cut out to be a pirate. I’m not sure I’m really ready for the implications and the consequences. Seeing Luffy with the blades to his neck, laughing the entire time. It put a lot of things in perspective today.” 

Usopp nodded. 

“It just makes me think that life is a fragile thing, that it's the journey and there's really no telling when it’ll be your turn, when your times’ up.” 

“Loss is never easy,” Usopp said, “Facing the inevitability of something as short as life is brave. It’s something my father had always said to me. That you need to be brave if you want to stand a chance in the world. I learned from a young age that when all the cards are stacked against you and you feel helpless that it's then that you have the most potential. If you can find it in yourself to make the best of a horrible situation you’re not letting them win. Them being life or whoever it is that's against you.”

“Bravery, huh?” Sanji mused while taking a drag of his cigarette. “I never thought of it that way. But what if when you’re backed into that corner and you’re helpless, and there's nothing you can do, if you’re over powered.”

“Then you can’t give them the satisfaction of knowing that you feel that helpless. If they can find a weakness then they’ve won.” 

Usopp tensed as he felt a slight pressure and warmth against his side. Sanji had leaned against him as he thought. 

“In theory, if they’ve won against you before and have instilled a fear and hatred that runs deep, how do you move on without the fear of being found?”

“Is this a hypothetical or should we be expecting someone to be following us?”

“We’re pirates now there's always going to be someone following us.” 

“Touche,”

“But what would you do in that situation?”

“I think I would have to find it in myself to be brave. To remind myself I’m alive and that I have nakama who care for me.” 

“Well, I guess here's to being brave.” Sanji huffed as he glanced out at the starry sky. 

It was the first time in a long time that Usopp longed for the ability to see. Just to catch one glimpse at the expression on Sanji’s face. What he would give to help him find a moment's peace. Usopp could only hope that Sanji’s fear was unfounded. 

The trek up reverse mountain was exhilarating. Usopp thought it tasted like the sweetness of honey coupled with the tingling sensation left on his tongue after carbonated beverages. Like that moment of sledding down a steep hill and hitting a bump that sends you careening through the air. The experience itself was hard to put to words but he knew the others felt the same. They were all so overjoyed that he could allow himself to tune out the devil-fruit eater's scream as Nami technically murdered him. There was no way he'd survive in these waters. It was chaotic, it was beautiful. It was the start of a new chapter. _He was thoroughly overwhelmed._

The joy and jubilation buzzing around the ship as the realization dawned on them. This was just the start. They were all going to chase their dreams across the Grandline. They would be seeing and experiencing things so unlike anything they’ve ever known. Usopp would find his courage. He would chase his dream and become a brave warrior of the sea. 

He’d be there with the others every step of the way. Helping Nami create that map of the world, helping Sanji find his All Blue, helping Zoro become the greatest swordsman, helping Luffy become the Pirate King. 

Once again Usopp wished he could have committed their faces to memory, he could hear the thickness of the tears in their voices, could feel the excitement trembling in their legs as they crushed the barrel. 

As the reached the peak, Usopp let the weightlessness propel him, his words muffled under the roaring of the water, 

_“Be brave Usopp,”_

It wasn’t until he’d been a part of the crew for a little while that he really started to notice things. While he felt accepted and was beginning to make fewer slip ups he also realized he was a liar. A good old pathological liar.

He knew that his reputation back home preceded him. He knew it. But here on the open ocean with the strangers turned family, he was starting to pick up on everyone's little habits. Zoro was left handed, he knew that there were more right handed swordsman. He was also super paranoid about stairs. The only time Zoro’s footsteps edge into cautions are when he's around or on stairs. Usopp doesn’t quite get that one, the cleaning of his swords, sure, makes sense, stairs, not so much. 

Nami only used a single brand of ink that seemed to cling to her like a new perfume. She ordered them around like a tyrant, though she promised it was for their safety. She was also meticulous about their money. Given her experience and upbringing it didn’t surprise him that she hoarded the money.

What did bother him was that she’d send him out with money that meant little to nothing to him, and he’d come back with less than he should have given the simple task. As much as he wanted to crawl out of his own skin when she lit into him he should have known better. You can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest, but it's the honest ones that really take advantage of you. It why he, along with Zoro, now need a chaperone for outings. He doesn’t mind the company but the idea of having to be babysat because he's incompetent is mildly humiliating. 

Luffy is an enigma. No matter how much time he spends around the rubber captain he never feels closer to understanding him. He’s like an overgrown child but has moments where he turns completely serious. The transition leaves Usopp with whiplash. Luffy doesn't speak much about his life before joining the crew. About where he came from or how he lived or his family. But he does mention one name a lot, Shanks. The crinking of straw tells Usopp that he clings to his hat subconsciously as he tells those stories. 

Take earlier that day for example, when Usopp had tucked himself between Nami’s tangerine trees and taken out one of his books, the Captain had appeared out of thin air to inquire about what he was doing. While Usopp was normally always ready for a Luffy prank, he could feel himself growing more and more restless. He was internalizing his journey and needed to sit back and take his mind off things. He still couldn't quite believe this was his life. As his fingers skimmed along the words, Luffy had decided that was the perfect time to drop in. The book was plucked from his grasp and Usopp couldn’t stifle the shout of surprise. 

“What are you reading?”

“Its a legend about giant warriors,” Usopp said cautiously. 

“Does it have pictures?” Usopp could tell Luffy was now flipping through the book, he couldn't tell what face the Captain was making. He fought the urge to smack his forehead. 

“No Luffy, it doesn’t have pictures,” 

“Awww that boring,” Luffy pauses, the sound jarring enough to make Usopp lunge for the book. 

“Theres no words,”

Usopp opened his mouth to retort. “No its-”

“Ah so it’s a secret book,” Luffy laughs, snapping the book closed with a thud, patting the book before smacking Usopp on the shoulder, the impact making him cough. 

“No its-” 

“Lunchtime Losers,” Sanji crows, which must mean Nami is already inside, and effectively ending the conversation.

  
  
  


“Don’t you even read?” Nami hissed, pulling the chart or map she’d shoved in Usopp’s face back. 

“I can read,” Usopp grit out. He could have sworn he heard the pot Sanji had placed on the burner rattle. 

“Oh yeah?” She threatened. Usopp didn’t understand why she was taking it so personally. 

“What’s with that tone?” 

“I’m only asking because I never see you read you hand Sanji the wrong containers when you help out, you can’t count money, I mean how could you possibly return with that much less when I send you out, so I’m asking if you can read?”

Usopp felt his face burning. There was the sound of someone's mouth opening, before snapping it shut. He didn’t miss the way Zoro’s hand shot to his swords bracing for a fight. The slight clack they made as he popped them from their sheath set the table on edge. He couldn’t tell what the other looked like because when he was embarrassed the blood rushing to his head tended to cut out any other input from his environment.

“What’s wrong with not being able to read?” Luffy asked. He wasn’t sure if it was because the Captain couldn’t read or if it was because he was trying to save Usopp's hide. 

“There's nothing wrong with not being able to read, but there is if you lie about it,” 

Usopp has had this discussion a lot. There were things he could read. There were special books Kaya had sent for which taught him his letters and words. He knew them verbally but he never got to read them like normal sighted people did. 

“Look I can read but I’m not very good at it,” Usopp decided on saying. “You’ve seen my Village, there isn’t even a formal school there. It’s on the parents to teach their children that kind of thing. My dad's a pirate, and left before I was five. Unfortunately my mom died when I was young, I never got more than the basics, and I never really practiced with them as I got older so technically yes I can read, but no I’m not good at it, not in the conventional sense.” 

Usopp cringed at the bite in his words. He noticed the collective flinch as Nami apologized for getting frustrated and not knowing. 

He hated that he could have just told them the truth. But he’s kept the facade going long enough that he worries about the consequences of telling everyone. He can feel Luffy’s attention to him. He knows down the line something will happen and he’ll have to tell them but at the moment he can’t his pride won’t let him. 

“Why didn’t you tell me that I handed you the wrong containers?”

“Well, you don’t strike me as the kind of person who grew up cooking, it’s an easy mistake to make.” 

“Sanji, can I ask you a question? And I want you to be honest.” Usopp said. 

He heard Sanji set down the pan he’d been drying. He’d just made a bowl of piping hot fried rice and was finishing off the chicken that would accompany it. 

“Sure,” though he sounded hesitant. Usopp supposed its because normally it’s Sanji coming to him to vent, or question his place in the universe. Usopp being serious and needing that kind of thing was a little out of character for him. 

“Why do you treat me differently?” 

“Huh?” He heard the shifting of fabric as Sanji turned to face him. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean,” 

“Well… it’s just that you place women on a pedestal, and you treat the other guys rough. Sure you kick me around too but not nearly as much as the others.”

“Oh,” it was quiet, almost as if he hadn’t even realized he did it. 

“I was… umm just wondering, you don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to. I mean-”

There was a huff of laughter from Sanji before he said, “I’m not sure. I really don’t know Usopp. There's just something about you-”

“What do you mean something about me?” He asked incredulously as Sanji backtracked to rephrase. 

“That came out wrong, what I meant was you’re different from the others, you actually care about me beyond the food aspect.” 

“You know that’s not true right? You know we all care about you more than a cook Sanji. I can guarantee you Luffy would even fight the Celestial Dragons if it meant protecting any of us.” 

The shift in posture and the way Sanji’s breathing changed told him that Sanji hadn’t entertained the train of thought. 

Usopp steadied himself, urging himself to be brave and not fuck this up because depth perception was still a dumb concept.

He cautiously crept towards Sanji, lips moving as he silently counted his way to the sink. He opened his arms and tentatively pulled Sanji close. He felt the other tense before he awkwardly settled into the hug. 

“Sanji, I’ll tell you everyday, for no matter how long it takes to get you to realize you’re more than just our cook. You’re nakama and there's no take backs.” He felt Sanji’s shoulders jump and heard the wet laugh. Usopp could tell he was trying not to cry but the wetness on his shoulder was sign enough. Usopp gave one more squeeze, noting the faint hint of mint and spice intertwined with the lingering smell of nicotine, before parting from Sanji. 

“So, shall I set the table,” Usopp grinned, trying to hide the faint dusting of a blush on his cheeks. 

If you were ever to ask Usopp if he thought he’d be helping a Princess try to expose a corrupt pirate turned world leader, stop a rebel movement, and protect her father, the King, he would have told you that you were crazy. But here they were, taking in two not so psycho’s that had been part of the very organization that earlier had tried to kill them. 

Definitely not something on his bucket list. He’d noted that Sanji seemed happy to have another female on board, and Vivi was nice enough to take them all in stride. She had the patience of a saint, he really didn’t understand how she could handle them. They were a far cry from the kind of people he imagined a royal to know. Their manners, along with general caution had been thrown to the wind. He knew he was as bad as Luffy some days, and could be as unhelpful in a fight as Nami. They weren’t useless, but seemed like amateurs compared to the monster trio. The trip so far had taught him a lot about himself. One of the most glaringly obvious was that his little secret was a ticking time bomb. 

He was loathe to admit that he couldn’t really take in the giants as he had dreamt. The books he'd read about Elbaf had been descriptive and used such flowery imagery that he could let himself imagine. The giants spoke of their home in just the same way. He somehow managed to get Brogy to explain things in detail without relying on visuals and decided Elbaf would be an official destination on his bucket list. The honorable giants embodied everything he aspired to be and more. The sheer passion and manliness they embodied left Usopp in awe. He knew that he wasn’t as rugged or masculine as some of his crew. That he wasn’t as gentlemanly or as outgoing. That kernel of self doubt grew as he processed that he was more feminine and meek than his nakama. It was shameful and left him with a self-loathing he hasn’t felt in a long time. He was useless in Little Garden. 

While the others had taken a more pronounced role in the experience, hell Zoro had tried to cut his own legs off to save them, he was left powerless and at the mercy of his crew. 

He hadn’t decided that he needed to say anything about his condition until Nami got sick. He placed part of the blame on himself, he hated that he hadn’t noticed it sooner. Vivi had been the one to comfort him and state that Nami hid it from them. That hindsight can lead to putting the pieces together differently, exploring entirely new angles, of tricking yourself into believing you could have changed things. 

She wasn’t wrong but it still didn’t settle the yawning pit in his stomach. 

Finding a doctor became paramount. The weather had shifted, the cold air having a bite to it. He found himself seeking out Sanji. He knew that the cook was trying everything in his power to cook up something to get Nami back on her feet but even so things seemed grim. Their normally cheery ship was downtrodden and gloomy. 

“Hey,” 

Sanji grunted in acknowledgement. 

They stood in silence before Usopp heaved a sigh and rested against the counter. 

“Tell me if I’m in your way,” 

Sanji didn’t verbalize so Usopp let himself assume that it was because he nodded. The sound of crisp vegetables being chopped and the rhythmic sound of the knife meeting the cutting board gave Usopp an idea. 

  
“Hey Sanji, what does cooking feel like?” 

The chopping stopped. 

“What does cooking feel like?” He parroted. 

“Yeah, I mean, we all perceive the world differently so my experience cooking as a non-chef is different. You obviously love cooking so I’m curious what does it feel like to you, how would you describe it.” 

He saw Sanji pause, and noticed he shifted closer to Usopp, which meant he was favoring his left. 

“That's kind of hard. Cooking comes as easy as breathing to me now.” 

“Then that means that there was a time that it didn’t,” 

“I suppose, but it's hard to explain,” 

“I’ll try.” Usopp said, wiggling his toes in his boots as he thought. Completely missing Sanji's look of bewilderment. 

“Cooking is the smell of smoke and cracking and popping of the wood. It's the warmth of the fire and fuzzy flannels. It's the taste of warm syrupy sweetness melting like butter on your tongue. It's hearing your friends laugh and getting sleepy with a full stomach. Its burrowing deep into a sleeping bag knowing that everything is right within that pocket of time.” 

Sanji had let himself study Usopp as the boy lost himself in his explanation. He noticed that he rarely mentioned colors or visuals beyond fleeting colors. Somewhere the cogs in his mind were pointing him towards a conclusion, but he couldn’t be sure. Not yet. 

“Very poetic,” Sanji mused as he turned back to the carrots in front of him. 

“Your turn,” Usopp quipped. 

Sanji let himself think back to the creaking wood of the baratie, the crisp morning air as he let himself enjoy a cigarette before heading down to the kitchen. The sound of Zeff’s gait, _tap thump, tap thump, tap thumping_ on the floor. The fondness of his smile. The way the lines on his aging face would crinkle as he told Sanji where to go and how to get there, the sappy fatherly fondness as he referred to Sanji as his Eggplant. 

“I guess cooking is the sound of the burners clicking on. That rhythmic _clack, clack, clack,_ and the _fwoosh_ of gas as it finally ignites. It's the sizzling of bacon in a pan, and the clinking of ice cubes in water pitchers. It's the blinding smile and the priceless expression of someone savoring your food. It's like a warm hug after a really bad argument, or a soft, fluffy blanket and a cup of tea sitting next to a window in a storm. It's the flavors that dance and coat your tongue as you try a new recipe for the first time.” 

Sanji paused to study Usopp again. His eyes were closed and he looked as if he were imagining exactly what Sanji was describing. The cook felt himself smile, something about their Sniper was different, his stories were detailed and animated, the ways he's described things, it was almost as if you could reach out and touch everything. The vividness of his descriptions were captivating, intoxicating. Emboldened Sanji continued, shifting his experience a bit. 

“Learning to cook was challenging,” He began going through the motions of preparing the meal again, punctuating his cuts with points of his story. He watched Usopp’s fingers tapping against the counter in time with the slices of the vegetables. 

“When I first started cooking was frustrating. It was like the shrill whistling of a tea kettle, and the rattling of dishes in a storm,” He watched as Usopp’s brow furrowed in thought. 

“It was the feeling of pricking your finger, the strange sensation of tightness that sometimes surrounds a wound and the tickling sensation of dried blood. It was warm water and soap and the pulling sensation of adhesive bandages. It was the countless critiques, booming voices, and-” Sanji cut himself off as his family came to mind. 

The clattering of his knife on the board startled Usopp out of his trance. 

“Sanji are you okay?” Usopp tried, his voice tight and panicky. 

Sanji hadn't realized how close Usopp had been before his hands were splayed in the air next to him, like he was feeling for Sanji. This close, their breath mingling in the space between them, he realized. Usopp despite being so close wasn’t focused on him, his eyes were cloudy, the right coated in a milky-ish film he’d never noticed before. 

It struck him then that only Luffy had ever broken that barrier with Usopp. The captain had no concept of personal space, so he had to have noticed. In the times that Sanji would utilize the Usopp listening service he’d never really taken the time to watch the sniper, to start unraveling the mystery. 

Zoro throwing the door open, startled them both out of whatever that moment had been. Sanji mentally cursed himself and then his family as he turned his attention to Zoro. He watched Usopp relax but squeezed his hand in a manner that he hoped was reassuring. The sniper relaxed a bit as Sanji threatened to maim the swordsman for his utter lack of tact and care for watching Vivi. She’d been pushing herself too hard and wasn’t allowing herself any slack. It was obvious she was considering this her fault as well. 

After Zoro had wandered out, Sanji had again turned to Usopp. The sniper had been silent throughout the Zoro exchange and he was nervously chewing his lip. 

“Hey, sorry about that. It’s still a bit jarring to think back on the early days of cooking for me. A lot of stuff happened and it startled me when it all came crashing back is all. I’m not hurt so that's good.”

“Oh, good,” Usopp breathed, defaulting a bit. 

“That's a cool little trick, the visualization. I hear some people are so good at visualizations that they can imagine entirely new worlds from that alone.” 

“Seriously?”

Sanji was tempted to say that Usopp was one of those people. He could immerse them in a world of his own creation with his words alone.

“I’ve also heard of people who visualize things and can kind of unlock eidetic memory capacity.”

“That sounds fake.”

“It’s not!” Sanji defends, “There are people who have found that if you link an object with a physical location then you can remember better.” 

“So it’s just aggressive memory categorization. Not a true eidetic memory.”

Sanji makes a face, hoping to get a rise out of Usopp, but feels his heart sink a bit when there's no response. He filed that reaction away to analyze later. 

“So could you do the memory technique for a place you’ve never been?” Usopp asked seriously. 

“I guess, it just helps to get you bearings,” 

Usopp snorted, his nose twitching. “That's a load of bullshit.” 

“What, you don’t believe in getting your bearings?” Sanji asked incredulously. 

“Trust me I struggle with being aware of my surroundings on a daily basis, no matter what techniques you instill you’re still off target. In a perfect world with only you and no outside influence sure you’d be fine getting around. But as soon as other people are added to the equation there's a degree of uncertainty.” 

“You don’t look like you struggle to know where you are.” 

As if to add insult to injury Zoro steps into the kitchen and looks around while scratching his head before leaving all while mumbling to himself. The pair burst into laughter, the belly deep, gut-busting laughter. 

“See, you’re more aware than that neanderthal.” 

“Hey, being directionally challenged is a real issue. We must protect the lost,” Usopp tried, but couldn’t stop his face from splitting into a smile. 

“Ah yes, you're quite right, a real shame if-” 

A startled shout and the plunking sound of something heavy hitting the water reached them. 

“Mr. Bushido!” Vivi called, voice tinged with worry. 

A sopping wet Zoro and a startled Vivi found them doubled over on the kitchen floor laughing like hyenas. 

Usoop had grown comfortable, more than he would have liked to admit all things considered. The threat of Wapol wasn’t something he wanted to linger on. But the island had a doctor, one on the other side of the island if Usopp had understood correctly. He and Vivi were making their ascent but of course nothing ever goes according to plan. With the constant snow, unfamiliar environment and too many things for Usopp to process to effectively use his haki he felt powerless. Zoro and Karu were supposed to be watching the ship, but he and Vivi were supposed to be trying to find the doctor. Luffy, Sanji and Nami had gone ahead, probably in the wrong direction based on what they'd just learned. 

The snow was an assault to his already weak retina and he realized he was in a bad way. He was as blind as many had believed him to be. The normal crutches he used to be able to present as normal were taken away from him in the storm. 

Vivi was calling directions at him, commanding him like he was some sort of pawn. He couldn't take it anymore. The frustration, the helplessness, the crushing stress of the past few days. Usopp snapped. 

No... he exploded. 

“NO I DIDN’T SEE THAT RABBIT JUST NOW, NO I CAN’T FOLLOW THAT MOVEMENT IN THE TREES? WHAT TREES VIVI? EVERYTHING FUCKING WHITE AND COLD!!! I’M FUCKING BLIND OKAY?”The tears streamed down his face, he wanted them to burn but they just left icy tracks across his cheeks. 

He stomped his way through the snow, it did nothing to soothe the boiling rage bubbling over. 

He heard her gasp, one of shock and regret, heard the quick crunching of her footsteps as she ran through the snow. 

“Wait, please, _Usopp_ ,” She shouted.

He let his shoulders drop, let the weight of his pathetic outburst pull him down. 

Vivi was standing in front of him. Her breath coming in warm clouds. He assumed she was testing his vision, and he thought he’d scream if he heard _“How many fingers am I holding up?”_ one more time. 

“You’re really blind.” She breathed in disbelief. 

“Who would lie about being blind?” 

“That’s not what I meant,” She said hurriedly. “It’s just, you can do everything that we do, except-”

“Except I can’t see?”

“No, it’s just, I don’t know how to say this without being insensitive,” She paused.

“Just say it,” He groaned. He was not in a good mood. Plus the snow was starting to saturate his coat. 

“You don’t act blind.” He saw her flinch. 

“You’re right that is insensitive,” He spoke again before she could start with the apologies. “Well, I guess I’m lucky. I’m fully blind in one eye and low vision in the other. I’ve been told it was retinal damage I can’t remember if it was pre or post-natal but it’s supposedly congenital. My left eye can see blurry colors. So you’re just a blob of blue and mostly yellow to me.” 

“So you can’t see faces?”

“No, just general blurry shapes and muted colors.” 

“Woah, so what about-”

“I swear I’ll answer all your questions later, but please, they-”

He heard her sharp inhale, “They don’t know so they, your crew?” 

“I think Luffy might but no I don’t think that they do.” 

“So what now,” 

“What indeed,” Usopp muttered as he stared blankly at the neverending white in front of him. 

It was always exciting to gain a new member. While Usopp was thrilled that they had a doctor now, he couldn’t help but be weary. He let himself join in with the antics and had tried his best to shake off the critical eyes of both doctors. 

Kureha had cornered him while he was alone, which was as unpleasant as he imagined. She grabbed his face and jerked his chin up so she could look into his eyes. Whatever she saw had her clicking her tongue and sighing. 

“Do they know?”

“Do they know what?” He could feel himself breaking into a cold sweat, his palms turning clammy. 

“Don’t play coy, with me. You know exactly what I’m asking.” 

Usopp’s shoulders curled in on himself. 

“I don’t know.” 

“Well you best prepare yourself, because my Chopper is a great doctor and will probably out your secret.” 

Usopp grimaced. He was afraid of that. Even if Vivi hadn’t meant it, she’d already adapted her behavior, almost to the point of overbearing. 

“Theoretically, how could I go about-”

“I’m not going to help you hide this,” She said flatly. The finality in her voice shocking. 

“Well if you’d let me finish you’d know that I was going to ask how I could prevent my crew from changing the way that they act around me. I’m not this fragile and helpless creature. I can do things on my own and I’ve had a lot of practice adapting. Hell I’ve even learned to shoot, I mean I owe it to dad for the haki training but-”

“Haki training? You know how to use Haki?”  
  


“Observation Haki, my dad taught it to me so I could defend myself. He tried to help me learn the basics and said the rest was up to me,” 

“So you use that to gauge your surroundings?” 

“I try to,” Usopp admitted. 

Kureha laughed, the sound echoing off the icy walls. “You’ll be fine kid, trust me. I’ve seen a thing or two.”

She swung something in her hand, the scent of alcohol itched at his nose as she muttered to herself. _“King of the Pirates, and a blind sniper who relies on Haki… New age indeed.”_

“I haven’t decided if you’re all brave or stupid,” She laughed, stepping away from where she’d caged him agaisnt the wall. 

“Good luck, you’ll need it.” 

Usopp grit his teeth as the crew screeched. He knew. He’d lost sleep over this very situation occurring. He'd been on edge since his conversation with the old witch. 

“What?” Chopper asked, the picture of innocence. 

“YOU’RE BLIND?” Nami shouted, marching way too close for comfort to stare into his eyes. 

He counted back from twenty before speaking. 

“Yes, I’m blind not deaf so please lower your voice, and please take a step back, its uncomfortable being this close to you.” His voice was nasally. 

Nami didn’t even realize she’d had a death grip on his shoulders, he'd have bruises in the morning, and bent his nose at an absurd angle to stare into his eyes. 

“So the money, and the reading,” She muttered to herself and Usopp knew that she was about to beat herself up over it. 

“Look, don't get upset over it. The past is the past, you didn’t know.”

“But I was insensitive and I was -”

“And you didn’t know.”

“How are you so good at sniping if you can’t see?” The apparent shock in Zoro’s voice stirred some pride in Usopp. 

“My dad taught me. It’s a lot of relying on other senses and extreme awareness of surroundings. Unfortunately I still have a lot of room for improving on that front. I’ve had to use it for longer periods of time and for greater distances, so that's why I have the frequent headaches.”

“Looking at the sun doesn’t help,” Nami muttered. 

“That was like one time,”

“More than once, Luffy pitched in. 

“You! Why aren’t you shocked?” Nami demanded. 

Luffy laughed, “Because his father told me how proud of his son he was. He said, _'My son is almost as good a shot as me, and he’s blind. Puts these people to shame.'_ Plus I’ve never seen him miss a shot, Usopp or his Dad.” 

“How could you leave us in the dark about this?” Nami demanded. 

Usopp tried not to think about how silent Sanji was. 

What he didn’t see was the expression of shock and the way Sanji had all but forgotten how to breathe. He didn’t see as the cook processed and analyzed every interaction between them, searching for any kind of sign. He didn’t see the flicker of distraught as he processed. 

“They didn’t know?” Chopper asked, perplexed. 

“The Great Captain Usopp is just so great that you wouldn’t even know.” He grinned. 

“Well, I guess now that the cat’s out of the bag. I should say I’m fully blind in my right eye, and low vision in my left. Basically I can see muted blurs of color but that's it, it's even if its multiple colors it looks just like a gradient single color. It's not really common for me to see mutable colors far away you have to be really close for me to see the multiple colors. I can’t really make out patterns or shapes. I can't read normal books but I can read braille. It's like a code for the normal alphabet but made for people with limited vision. Any other questions?”

At once everyone raised their hand. Usopp just continued to stare at them before Chopper shouted in realization. 

He loved his Nakama, he did, but just like always he felt that dread settling deep. Things were going to change whether he liked it or not 

He pleaded with himself to, _“Be brave Usopp,”_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone gets on the same page.

Having Chopper on board was highly entertaining. He was like the brother Usopp had always wanted. He’s incredibly smart for his age but is able to switch between doctor and friend easily. At least Usopp thought so. He could tell that Chopper was still getting used to them. He didn’t blame the kid they were a lot to handle. Usopp thought he was holding it together nicely, sans that one outbreak the day afterwards. The crew had done a complete one-eighty, treating him like a helpless child. Like he couldn’t do anything on his own. He didn’t regret his words, maybe his tone but not the words themselves. 

_ “Don’t pity me, I didn’t say anything and no one suspected anything before so don’t you dare start treating me differently now. Do you know what it feels like to be treated like an invalid when I’m perfectly capable of handling things on my own?”  _

Like always things changed. While he sure as hell didn’t agree with everyone “ _subtly_ ” adapting to him now that they knew of his disability, some changes were appreciated. He didn’t have to worry about the crippling guilt and anxiety that came with night watches, and accidentally exposing them to danger. Nami had also stopped putting him in charge of money. They’d survived the chaos of Alabasta and now Robin was a part of the crew. Zoro didn’t bother to hide his distaste, but Sanji was already falling over himself to fawn over the ladies. He’d heard Nami giving Robin a disclaimer about him, but part of him couldn’t help but feel a bit like a lab rat under Robin’s permeating gaze. 

He knew that they meant well and he was beyond thankful for Luffy remaining as nonchalant about the whole thing as he was prior to the reveal. He let himself get lost in their antics, roping poor Chopper into them whenever possible, if only to spare himself the agony or realizing how much he missed Sanji. 

The cook was still aboard the Going Merry, but he’d distanced himself since learning about Usopp. No matter how much he reminded himself that Sanji wasn’t like that the distance hurt, and did nothing for the crippling self-doubt. He didn’t realize how much he’d relied on the other.

To make things easier for everyone Chopper had taken a couple of days to create a baseline of health for everyone in the crew. He started with Luffy and had gone from there. He’d kicked everyone else out for confidentiality purposes but Usopp could feel the cold sweat breaking out across his skin as he waited for his turn. He told himself it couldn’t be as bad as Zoro’s because he’d never heard Chopper screech like that. He didn’t want a repeat either but Zoro left his appointment with a huff, stomping petulantly towards the main deck. Sanji had followed and Usopp couldn't help but notice how silent the pair became after the cook’s turn. 

He was the final appointment, Chopper indirectly dragging this out had left him more flighty than usual. Usopp knew he startled easily and with the sleep he’d lost over the anticipation of his turn meant he couldn’t rely on his Haki so he'd been stumbling and bumping into more things. 

“Usopp,” Chopper’s voice had called out. He could feel everyone looking at him as he made his way towards the girls’ room. They’d been kind enough to let Chopper host the appointments there, but Nami had threatened them all within an inch of their lives if they messed it up or touched anything. 

“Hey Doc,” He could tell from Chopper’s voice that he enjoyed the title. The little blur in front of him wiggled. 

Chopper cleared his throat, switching back to his more professional manner.

“I’m going to do a normal physical and then I’ll be going over things I either find or past histories you might know about. Is that alright? For now I’m going to need you to dress down to your underwear. Are you alright with that?”

Usopp nodded, toeing off his boots and unhooking the straps on his overalls. He flooded his clothes and slipped off his socks before sitting on the couch Chopper was using as an exam table. 

Chopper hummed something, but the clack of his hooves on the floor alerted Usopp to his proximity. He wasn’t really listening to what Chopper was saying so he flinched when the cold stethoscope touched him. 

“Right, sorry,” Chopper whispered. “Sometimes I forget.” 

“I’d prefer if people forgot,” Usopp muttered and he felt Chopper pull away. 

“They mean well, it’s hard for people to understand your experience because of how different it is from their own.” 

“I know that, really I do. But it’s just so….” Usopp clenched and unclenched his hands

“Frustrating?” Chopper supplied. 

“Yes,” 

“It will take some time. I think the best thing we can do is to take it in stride and really talk about it. There's things about everyone that I really think should be put out in the open. I know that secrets are great and all and that there needs to be a certain degree of trust, but we’ll never make it as a crew if we don’t tell anyone everything.” 

Usopp smiled when he realized Chopper said “ _ we” _ . 

“Alright, I’m going to start the check-up again," 

Usopp breathed in and out when instructed to, walked and let himself be poked and prodded. He answered a myriad of questions which he was starting to realize was a mental evaluation of sorts. 

The scratching of Chopper’s pen on paper stopped when he heaved a sigh. 

“You’re doing great Usopp, this is the final piece. I’m going to need to check your eyes. Is that alright?” 

Usopp nodded this was the piece he was dreading the most. 

“I’m fully blind in the right eye, and barely see colors in the right,” He supplied. 

“You had said it was retinal damage, yes?” Chopper asked, the sound of objects clattering against the desk had Usopp jumping. 

There was a soft click of a den-den mushi and Usopp wanted nothing more than this part of the session to be over. 

Projected on the wall was his oldest nemesis. The stupid vision chart. No matter how many doctors studied him they could never quite explain what this issue was. He felt Chopper set a pair of goggles on his face. The metal was cold against his skin. 

“I’m sure you know what this is, but there's a few other things I’m looking for in this exam so please bear with me,” Chopper had said, flicking off the lights in the room so only the projection was there. 

Usopp bit his way through the color and supposed reading section. It sucked as much as he remembered it. Chopper had flipped between plates of colors, and thankfully had moved him close enough to search for splotches of other colors hidden within them. Usopp suffered his way through those. Another test had Usopp reacting to shivering lines on the screen. He saw none, but Chopper made some sort of intrigued sound and re-ran the test a few times just to be sure. Chopper had flipped through lenses and Usopp had lost track of which was one and what was two. But for the first time in his life that he could remember there was a little more clarity in his vision, the moment was fleeting when Chopper slipped the goggles from his face and took down some notes. Usopp told himself not to get his hopes up. 

The sound of the pen being placed on the clipboard signaled he’d finally survived the exam. 

“What's the prognosis, Doc?”

“Better than I had expected if I’m being honest with you,” Chopper began. 

That was a first as far as Usopp and his health was concerned. 

“Because the onset of this was so early in your life, I was worried about other developments, but you’re fine. You’re heart and lungs sound healthy, you’re muscle tone and weight are average for your build. So it looks like the only real issue is neurological and optic damage.”

Usopp could feel his head tilting in curiosity. 

“I conducted as many tests as I could with methods that have been shown to work, so aside from doing actual braining imaging I won’t be able to prove for sure, but your other senses have started to overlap with the visual areas that aren’t functioning. Here's to neural plasticity. Hypothetically, as a result other sensory information has leaked into and overlapped with those areas.” 

“But I found that you have additional conditions,” Chopper began, pulling his notes over to himself. “You are right that you are consciously blind in your right eye. This is due to damage in multiple locations, specifically V1, your visual cortex. However, I did notice something very peculiar about it during one of our tests. I wanted to confirm that I was actually seeing it.” 

Usopp held his breath. He was waiting to hear that they’d need to remove his right eye.

“You have a condition called blindsight in your right eye. You may think your eye is useless, but there is actual input coming from that eye. Unlike conscious vision which you see more of in your left eye, like color and such, your right eye sees movement. You aren’t consciously attending to the stimuli from that eye, but I needed to confirm with the additional tests and the repetition of the initial test to be sure that was the phenomena I was seeing. Humans actually have two visual pathways. In blind sight, the input from your eye is sent along another pathway. Your left eye goes through the thalamus to V1, your right eye input goes through the brainstem then to proper areas. Your right eye goes through a more primal type of vision.”

“That’s actually… really cool.” Usopp said. He was in disbelief. He’d always been told it was useless and he’d be better off without it. 

“Here, let me show you,” 

Chopper had disappeared from his left side and Usopp jerked his head to left ducking. 

“See.” 

“Ummm, what was that?” Usopp asked voice pitching. 

“It’s fascinating really. You aren’t consciously seeing it, but you know enough about how to orient yourself. You can detect movement and respond to it. Tell me, how often do you find yourself walking into things?”

“Not that often,” Usopp said, chewing on his lip in thought.  “But I thought it was because I was counting?” 

“Counting?”

“Yeah, it’s how I orient myself on the ship.”

“But what about on islands? How do you not hit your head on branches?” 

Usopp didn’t know. He tripped over things but those were normally stationary, but he’d dodged birds and-

“Exactly, so your right eye is actually doing more than you might think. I’ve heard from Doctorine that some people have been able to obtain observation Haki and through practice they can hone in on that motion aspect. As a result I think it’s important we protect your eye from any unintentional damage. You wear goggles in a fight but what if we were to have you in glasses or goggles all the time? 

“Umm,” Before Usopp could respond, Chopper went on,

“That brings me to your other eye. There's a way to aid it and take some strain off of it so that there is less stress on and work for the eye itself. The lenses would correct the light so it hits where it needs to on the retina, although I’m not sure how much processing would change as a result. That said, it’s to make your eye work smarter, not harder. I also proposed glasses because while they won’t perfect your sight they will enhance it to some degree. You remember when I had you choosing between the different strengths?”

“Yes,”

“So what I was also doing was adding a colored film to correct for any sort of color deficiency. I noticed that you in particular have tritanomaly. It’s less common as far as color-deficiencies are concerned, but just as real. It has to do with an abnormality in the S-cones, cells in your eyes. The ones that perceive blue light. As a result you see different less vibrant variations of common colors.”

“WAIT I DO?” Usopp shouted, then apologized, repeating softly, “I do?”

“Yes, I’ve attended patients back on Drum with protanomaly, which is a mild form of red-green color weakness. There are more severe forms of red and green blindness are also common. There are also individual variations too. I’ve seen red weak individuals whose cells had grown at different rates so one eye is more color weak than the other. With your variation you are blue weak and therefore see less vibrant greens, yellows and violets. You see more cyan and red, correct?”

“I mean I thought that was normal.”

“It’s not normal.” 

“You also have a slight astigmatism, but with your current eye condition I believe it wasn’t super apparent. Regardless I’d like to correct for it to let your eyes relax a bit more.” 

“Woah,” 

“Tell me about it, I’m pleasantly surprised.” Usopp could hear the smile in the little doctor’s voice. “Congrats your eyes aren’t a lost cause.”

Usopp laughed, that pressure and sickening dread lifting. 

“Actually the last thing,” Chopper amended. “Tell me, have you ever experienced visions? Like dreams that look like movies while you’re wide awake?” 

“No?” He said unsure. He didn’t remember any of those. 

“Let me know if you do, it’s more common in patients with damage or degrading of different senses.” 

“Great,” Usopp muttered. 

“They’re perfectly sane, it’s just a condition where the eye to make up for a lack of stimulation becomes over excited and fires on its own. It’s totally normal and most people don’t say anything in fear of being found psychotic, but they’re totally sane.” Chopper affirmed. 

“Okay, how about I tell you if that starts happening.” 

“Great,” 

Usopp felt himself almost floating as he left his check up. 

Everything on deck was peaceful, and he was glad for it. He made sure to thank the girls for letting him borrow their room for a while. He let himself walk to the stern of the boat, lost in thought. 

A cough to his right startled him. 

“Sorry I figured that was better than tapping you,” Sanji said calmly. 

“Oh, hey. Sanji-” Usopp’s voice totally didn’t crack there. 

“How was your Chopper visit?” Sanji asked, letting out a cloud of smoke. 

“Actually, really good. I found out my eyes aren’t as hopeless as I thought. I think that was the first time I’ve ever gotten such good news about them.” 

“I’m happy for you, I think that’s a cause worthy of celebration,” Sanji mused, flicking the ash over the railing. 

“Celebration?” 

“Yeah, good news deserves a treat.”

Usopp grinned. 

“Want to talk about your visit or nah?”

“I think I'll pass for now,” Sanji chuckled, there was something he was avoiding but Usopp wouldn’t push him on it. If it concerned him or Sanji wanted to tell him that was up to him. 

“How Hav-”

“I’m So-” 

They both froze. 

“You, go first,” They both said at the same time. 

Sanji let out an inflated laugh like he was nervous. 

“You first I insist,” Usopp pushed. 

“I-”

“Yes?” Usopp asked squinting at Sanji for effect, the both of them knowing it was completely for show. 

Sanji shook his head, the smell of his shampoo catching Usopp off guard. 

“I’m sorry, for distancing myself,” Sanji began. Usopp was tempted to interject but he wanted to hear what Sanji had to say. 

“I realized afterwards that it hurt you,” 

Usopp noted he was getting fidgety. 

“I hadn’t even considered how you would interpret that response. But I promise it had nothing to do with you or your vision. It was just kind of me over… over analyzing things.” 

“So,” Sanji said, soldiering on, “I’m sorry.” 

“Sanji, I accept your apology. At first it did hurt because I thought you hated me for not being able to see,”

“Never,” Sanji breathed, his voice restrained like he wanted to shout or cry. Usopp held up his hand and continued. 

“But, I realized you were all processing it. I know that you all don’t see or experience the world the way I do, and I had to try and put myself in your shoes. While it hurt at first I realized why you were doing it. I won’t hold that against you, any of you.” 

“I-” Sanji sound choked up. “I thought I’d messed up big time,” 

Usopp laughed, “Nope, you didn’t, but for future reference don’t retreat entirely.” 

“I’ll try,” Sanji promised. 

“Are we good?” Sanji eventually asked. 

“Yeah, we’re good,” 

“So what were you going to ask me?”

Several days later Usopp realized he was having too much fun with Chopper in regards to the limitless opportunities for jokes or hypothetical questions. 

“Well, bats use echolocation,” Chopper said, weary. "So marine mammals do too,"

“OOOOOH USOPP TRY THAT!” Luffy hollered. The rattling of cutlery on the table and Robin’s soft laugh told him that Nami had just punched Luffy. 

“So what, I just scream and hope I can see?” 

“Well echolocation is a way of orienting yourself based on sound. So if a sound wave goes out it’ll bounce back if it hits something and in theory would tell you it's location.” 

“You said that because I can’t really see I have more input from other senses right?” 

“Not exactly,”

“Go Usopp go!” 

The dull thud of Luffy’s face hitting the table and the subtle whine told him Nami had struck again. 

Usopp let out an ungodly scream, and dissolved into a fit of laughter, at the response. 

“Your faces are priceless,” Usopped wheezed. 

“You can see our faces?” 

“No I’m blind, I’m just assuming,” 

He could hear Nami grumbling. 

Luffy clapped calling for an encore but the threat of Nami feeding the both of them to the fishes killed that act. 

Usopp felt himself dragging his feet as they all gathered on the deck. They’d set up a picnic style spread loaded with all sorts of delicious food courtesy of Sanji. 

“Family meeting,” Nami had declared. 

“Shishishi, you said family,” Luffy giggled himself into hysterics. 

“You did, you said family,” Zoro grinned. 

“Awww Nami-swan are we a family?” Sanji cooed. 

Robin struggled to hide her own laugh. 

“Shut up, this is important you guys,”  And just like that the mood changed.

“I think that after everything so far it’s important to communicate. As a result I think that we need to air some dirty laundry,”

“But, Nami, my laundry is clean,” Chopper insisted. “It’s hanging to dry as we speak,”

“No, Chopper,” Nami sighed, “Not that kind of laundry.”

“Anyway, I think it’s important that we’re all on the same page and that we don’t have any big secrets. I don’t want them to come back and bite us in the ass later on down the road. If we know we can prepare for anything together. So this meeting is to address any issues you have as well as any secrets. I think we need to be totally honest because this isn’t just about any single person anymore. Like it or not we’re a family.”

Luffy cheered at that. 

“Also I think we need to have some boundaries. I want to know where everyone stands and have it be clear where I do too, you know?”

“So where do you suggest we start?” Robin asked. 

“Should we address the medical side of things because there are a few of you that really, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, you really need help. So talking about it will do that. Plus it’ll help us figure out future outing and fighting strategies. Plus there are some limitations that others may be able to compensate for.”

“Good idea Chopper,” Nami said, rubbing at her arms even though it wasn’t cold. Usopp fought the urge to smile, Chopper had finished crafting the glasses he’d mentioned and had even swapped out the tinted glass in his goggles, he'd get to wear them starting around dinner. 

“I’ll go first then, since it was my idea to have this meeting,” Nami said cautiously. Strangely no one volunteered to take her place. 

“So, I think that I should tell you all, that after what happened with… with... “

“The fishmen?” Luffy asked. 

“Yeah,” She breathed. “When I stabbed my arm and my hand, I did more damage than I had realized. As a result that side is now weaker. At the moment I can compensate for it but as we get stronger that's when it’ll start to show up.”

“As a doctor, I also recommended that she not ‘cause unnecessary strain to that side, so try to avoid letting her lift heavy things. It’s okay in an emergency but don't make a habit of it. She’s torn muscles, and tendons alike. She's very close to needing surgery because of a tear, so if we can avoid that we want to.”

“I had no idea,” Luffy whispered, sounding guilty.

“It’s not your fault, you stopped me before I could really do anything worse. Chopper called it a small miracle, so thank you Luffy, all of you.” 

Usopp grinned at Nami, he knew that the tough exterior was her way of protecting herself but he realized he needed to take a step back sometimes to be able to see past it. 

“Also,” Nami continued. “I’m sorry if I awful to you all, I hope you know I don’t mean it but-”

“We don’t fault you for slipping into tendencies that kept you alive. We know you care about us, and that it takes time to adjust.” Sanji had said, shocking Nami to silence. 

Usopp could hear rustling and then a surprised shout from Sanji to his right. Nami was hugging Sanji. Usopp wished he could have seen their expressions. He knew it had to be tender and heart warming since Zoro wasn’t cracking jokes. 

Nami then stood in front of him, keeping somewhat of a distance. “Usopp, I really want you to know that I’m sorry for being insensitive,” 

“I know Nami, and I accept your apology. It’s my fault for not telling you guys.”

“I still feel like shit for being insensitive, and want you to know that I really am sorry, and that you have full permission to call me on behavior like that in the future. I honestly can’t understand what you’re going through but I want to try.”

“Nami, look I’m sorry too, because I-”

She shook her head, “No, you should  _ never _ have to apologize for who you are.” 

Usopp could feel the tightness in his chest at the words. His own father had told him that years ago, it was strange how something so small could mean so much. 

Nami launched herself at him, and he held her tight. He knew it was hard to be this open about things. She was really baring all. 

“I guess I’ll go next then,” Usopp started, hearing Nami settle next to Robin again. “So I’m not as blind as I had been led to believe. I still can’t see by a long shot but Chopper has made glasses that take some strain from my eye and clear up some colors. I’m blind in my right eye, but I do have blind sight which-”

“Really?” Robin asked, though she was looking at Chopper. 

“I know I was surprised too. I had to re-run the test so many times just to believe it,” 

“What’s blind sight?” He heard Zoro ask. 

“It’s when there is an absence of conscious vision and damage in the visual cortex. But the brain has two visual pathways, and the other pathway is working to a degree to help Usopp orient himself.” 

“That’s so cool,” Luffy said, staring at Usopp. 

"He also said he’s correcting for a few other visual things in my left eye, one of those is color. I’m apparently color deficient, so I had only seen reds and cyans before.”

“Wait, you’re telling me that Jolly Roger was painted before you knew you were color blind?”

“Yes?”

“Holy shit Usopp that's so cool!” Luffy cheered, pulling him into a rubbery hug. Usopp laughed and peeled Luffy off of him. 

“I want you all to know that I know you mean well and that you’ve probably never lived with a visually impaired person but I’m not helpless. I can do a lot of things on my own. You all probably haven’t even realized you do this, but you’ve all changed the way that you interact with me. While I’ll gladly take the help with meals and night watches I’m not an invalid. I have other strategies to combat this condition, but it takes time and effort to learn, and countless hours of practice. I think in the future it would be nice to come up with a plan for battles because I can get around the ship, but on islands and stuff I struggle.” 

“I had no idea,” Nami had said. 

“I’m more than willing to answer questions about this, and I’m trying to be patient and understanding but sometimes it’s frustrating because you aren’t able to relate. Sometimes I doubt myself and work myself into anxiety attacks over the condition, so I just ask that you not change the way you see me. I am capable, you know.”

“We’ll do our best Usopp,” Robin assured him, and he could hear shifting which told him that the others were nodding. 

“That’s all I ask,” Usopp said softly. 

“I’ll go next,” Zoro interrupted. 

“I have… Chopper, what was the name of it again,”

“Topographic Agnosia,” 

“That, which is essentially a neurological condition which makes navigating or orienting myself in space a huge challenge. I know you all tease me for being directionally challenged but it’s more than that.”

“Shit, sorry, Marimo,” Sanji sounded apologetic. 

“Hell, I didn’t realize it was an actual condition, but still, try not to hold it against me.”

“We promise,” Luffy announced. 

“I’m sure you’ve all realized my paranoia about stairs by now, and I guess by extension falling, but that’s because…” They heard Zoro suck in a breath. They knew that he didn’t normally express this much emotion in his words so this was important. 

“My best friend, and rival growing up, she died after a fall down the stairs. So I’m terrified of losing someone else that way. I was supposed to be stronger than her, but I never got to tell her anything. Wado Ichimonji,” Zoro stated brandishing the mighty katana, “This was Kuina’s sword, and I’m going to achieve our dream of being the greatest swordsman.” He said softly. 

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Chopper had said, voice heavy with emotion. 

“It’s been years, but that Marine with Smoker, that woman,” Usopp didn’t need to see his face to know that he was cringing. 

“She just looks so much like Kuina and is just as obsessed with swords,” 

“So that’s why you avoid her?” Nami asked. 

“I try to at least,” 

“I’ll go next,” Sanji said, and Usopp could tell he was nervous. 

“Zoro, I want to apologize for picking fights with you.”

The crew let out a collective gasp. 

“Sanji, you don’t-” Chopper began obviously knowing where this was going. 

  
“It’s alright Chopper. I trust you guys.” 

The mood had changed again. 

“Cook, you don’t need to-”

“Please, just let me say this. Because I really don’t want to talk about it again after this.”

Zoro snapped his mouth shut. 

“I was born in the North Blue, into a terrible family that controls the underworld.”

Sanji didn’t dare let himself look at everyone’s faces, especially after hearing Zoro and Robin startle. Running through their knowledge of such people. 

“It wouldn't be the Vinsmokes, commanders of the Germa would it?” Robin questioned, apologizing when she realized Sanji flinched. 

“One of my brothers has the same stupid hair and I have to convice myself that I made it out and that you aren’t him. You look nothing like him aside from the hair but it’s still hard to unsee it.”

“Sanji-” 

The blonde just held up a hand, and Zoro paused. 

“I don’t like talking about it, but my siblings all grew into their brute, superhuman strength. I lagged behind and my family never let me forget it.”

Nami let out a sob, shushed by Robin. Sanji grit his teeth, he was making Nami cry. 

“They beat me to a pulp, terrorized me, threw me in the dungeon,” Sanji laughed but it was a flat sound. Usopp wanted to just reach out and touch him but he realized, Sanji might avoid physical contact and keep his distance because of his past. All of their past conversations began playing through Usopp’s mind. The dots were connecting. 

“I wasn’t even allowed to go to my own mother’s funeral.” 

“Sanji,” This time Nami started. It almost sounded pleading. 

He shook his head and continued. “But I owe my sister my life. She was the one that got me on a ship out of that horrible country. I was a stow-away and thats how I eventually met Zeff. I had spent a bit of time on that ship learning the basics of cooking, when Zeff had came. We ended up on that island without food for so long. To this day, I really don’t understand how we didn’t die, Zeff especially since he gave-” Sanji cut himself off, shaking his head.

The crew was silent. “Zeff has helped me to work through a lot of what happened to me as a kid but they’re still out there. I’ve done everything I can to try not to let them find me. I’m convinced that if they ever see a picture of me then they’ll remember that I got away and hunt me to the ends of the earth.”

“Sanji, can I hug you?” Luffy asked, hovering close but not touching. 

Sanji nodded and before he could realize it, they’d all squished him into a group hug. He was crying, and Usopp hated the Vinsmokes. Sanji was kind and caring. He was gentlemanly, and went out of his way to please others. 

When they separated, Sanji continued. “I have a lot of psychological things to work through between the fucked up family and the nearly starving to death. I know I'm my own worst enemy. It’s why I hate the unholy trifecta of me, myself, and I. If I can avoid having that much time alone with my thoughts, it's better. I spiral when I get to that point.”

“Sanji I’m so sorry,” 

“What for Nami-san? You can’t choose blood, but I think I’ve found a family worth being a part of.”

Sanji toppled to the deck when they all converged into another hug pile. 

“I’ll go next,” Luffy said, eyes gleaming as he crawled back to his seat. “I know some of you don’t think I’m smart but my brother always told me that there's different kinds of smart. You can have any combination of intelligence, and that smart doesn’t just mean book smart.” His voice was soft, sad even. 

“Ace?” Chopper asked.

“No, my other brother, Sabo.” 

The crew thought back to meeting Ace. He hadn’t mentioned another brother. Before they could further analyze their interactions with Luffy’s brother, their captain continued. 

“Ace wouldn’t have mentioned Sabo, but he did get a tattoo to honor him. He even spelled his own name wrong to do it. Sabo died when we were kids. He was born in Goa Kingdom to a noble family and they were just awful to him. Ace and I were raised by mountain bandits, cause Gramps left us there. Sabo had made a name for himself in Gray Terminal, and that's how he and Ace met. Gramps took me to Dadan, the lead mountain bandit lady, after everything with Shanks down in Foosha. They were stocking up on treasure to become pirates, which I thought was pretty cool. It wasn’t until after they saved me from Bluejam that we decided to become brothers. We exchanged cups of sake and that was that. But Sabo was about ten years old when he decided to set out to sea, he had been forced back to his parents right before they set Gray Terminal on fire. That day there were Celestial Dragons coming to town, but Dogra, one of the bandits, had realized it was Sabo. The Celestial Dragons blew up his ship.” 

He heard the others gasp. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever really recovered from losing Sabo, but Ace had changed then. With Sabo gone, he changed to take care of me. I think he resented that I’d always said Sabo was the nicer brother, ”

"I'm sure he didn't. Ace loves you and just didn't't want to see you hurting," Nami said, her eyes distant like she was thinking of her own bond with her sister. 

“Wait you and Ace aren’t related?” 

Luffy laughed, surveying his crew. He trusted them. 

“No, he's Roger's son.” 

The crew screeched. 

“Okay, and Sabo, he was a noble?”

“ _ Shishishi _ yeah, he was actually supposed to marry the princess of Goa.”

“Holy shit.” Usopp felt himself mutter, the others doing the same. 

“Luffy?” Robin began.

“Mmn?”

“You wouldn’t happen to have any relation to Monkey D. Garp would you?” 

“Oh, you know Gramps?”

Nami screamed, punching him in the head. 

“Garp, the hero, is your grandfather.” 

“Luffy, do you know your father?” Robin asked. 

“Nope,”

“Luffy, do you know who Garp’s son is?”

“Nope,”

“Luffy, your dad is Monkey D. Dragon. He's the head of the Revolutionary Army.” 

“What the F-”

“Language,” Robin hissed in Zoro’s direction, covering Chopper’s ears. 

“Robin how did you?”

“While I was running away from the government I managed to get in with a local movement and met a branch of the revolutionary army. I learned Dragon’s last name from one of the senior officers who wanted me to join them.”

“I hope they realize how much jeopardy they put their boss into.” 

“Probably not,” Robin started thinking back to the strange man with the ridiculous hair. 

“I guess I’ll go now. I’m sorry if I push you away and get very cryptic. It was a coping mechanism I developed as a child to protect myself. I know that it’s terrible, and I do try to tone it down, but still it’s hard. I have a lot of psychological things I still need to work through but I don’t think I’ll ever fully recover from that. I also have ties to Kuzan the Ice Admiral. He helped me escape the Buster Call.”

“Woah,” Nami breathed, looking with wide eyes at Robin. 

“So, I’d like to apologize for the distance, but it’s hard to let people in. I’ve been alone for so long so it’s an adjustment.” 

“We’ll always fight for you Robin,” Luffy said sincerely. 

“I guess that leaves me,” Chopper said looking at all of them. “I guess I don’t really have as much to say. I've grown up thinking I was a monster. I wanted nothing more than to be human and to have friends. But I found something better I think. I have a family now. But I do feel guilty if I can’t help you guys. My dream is to cure anything, and I know I’ve made mistakes but Doctorine has told me that that's the only way to learn. Just,” Chopper turned with pleading, glassy eyes to Sanji, 

“Don’t serve mushrooms, they make me sad, they make me-”

“Sure Chopper, I won’t serve you mushrooms,” He said, ruffling the doctor’s fur. 

“Well that was cathartic, and informative,” Nami said, stretching. 

“Should we address plans?” 

“Oh, yeah, we should.” Nami agreed.

“So Zoro, if we were to put paint on your hand or like a sticker on your boot would you be able to tell left from right?” Chopper asked. 

“I dunno?” He said staring at his shoe in thought. 

“Okay… so short of keeping him on a leash and tugging him along what do you suggest?”

“Lets try the sticker idea, and see if that works for now.”

“Can’t hurt,” 

Nami snickered, “Not anything but his pride.”

“Oi!” Zoror shouted at her. 

“As for Usopp, how should we handle fights?” 

“You can tell left from right, right?” 

“Yes,” He huffed. 

“Alright so we’re good there.”

“What about money?”

“Nope, don’t make me responsible for that. The bills all look the same.”

“Alright, duly noted.”

“Chaperones,” Robin decided. 

“Zoro needs one because he gets lost walking in a straight line,” 

“ ‘m not straight,” He muttered. 

“What?” Robin asked, grin wicked. 

“What?” Zoro asked, face dusted pink. 

“Did you say something?”

“No,” He said petulantly. 

Robin laughed before continuing, “Zoro needs a chaperone to keep him from wandering. Usopp needs one to help him get back to the ship, but they can’t be paired together. Honestly, I have more faith in Usopp’s ability to find his way back, but we should avoid it.”

“Luffy, could use someone to keep him in check, and not be super impulsive.” 

“Agreed,” the crew unanimously agreed. Ignoring his whine of protest.

“Sanji, where women are concerned you need someone to be able to reel you in,” 

He grumbled, but didn’t disagree. 

“Well that settles it.” Nami declared, standing. “Now that that's all out of the way, does anyone else feel lighter?”

There were grumbled yeses, as they moved to go back to what they were doing before the meeting. 

“Hey Sanji,” Usopp started, he propped himself up on the counter top, the one in the far corner that they used as extra storage for dry ingredients. He kicked his feet lightly as he waited for Sanji to respond. 

“What’s up?” Sanji asked, meticulously gathering ingredients. He tapped Usopp’s knee, and the sniper held his feet in the air as he grabbed the ingredients, swiftly shutting the cabinet. 

“I just wanted to check in with you, and to let you know that the Usopp listening service still exists. I want you to know that we’re all here for you, and that no one should have to have gone through what you did.” 

Sanji froze, bag of flour in hand. He stared wide-eyed at the sniper. He had a moment where he nearly dropped the bag. Just imagining the mess and the flour everywhere had him placing the flour on his section of the counter.

“And I’m sorry if I’m overstepping but I just want to make sure that you’re alright and that you know that you’re safe and cared for,” Usopp wanted to say loved, but his heart fluttered uncomfortably at the thought. 

“Thank you, really,” Sanji said, his voice heavy with emotion. 

“You’re welcome, and I understand the trifecta as you called it earlier. It’s why I talk a lot. It’s like if I can make enough noise I’m not alone with my thoughts.”

Sanji laughs. “That's a good coping mechanism. Maybe not all the time but it’s better than some others,”

“Chopper chewed you out about smoking didn’t he?” Usopp sang, breaking off into a laugh as Sanji sputtered. 

“I won’t tell but, he has been muttering to himself when you walk past with a cigarette hanging from your mouth,” 

“Of course he has,”

“Don’t worry he’s cussed Zoro out too because of his alcohol consumption and his inability to relax when wounded.” 

“Glad I’m not the only one,” Sanji huffed, but Usopp could tell he was smiling. 

“He’s called me out too. I’m not used to the glasses so he’s on my case about them.”

“Yikes, he may be a kid, but incurring the wrath of chopper is-”

“Terrifying,”

Sanji laughed as he flicked on the burner. He stepped back as it made the rhythmic snapping sound before it ignited.

“I think I felt that heat wave over here. How high is that flame?” 

“Perfect height,” Sanji said, pouring oil and something else into the pan. 

“Sure,” Usopp grinned, enjoying the reaction he got out of Sanji. 

“Well, I think tonight is a comfort food kind of night,” Sanji mused, surveying the counter. 

“Want to help?” He asked directing his attention to Usopp. 

“Huh?” 

“I asked if you wanted to help. I thought about what you said earlier, and you’re right. You’re perfectly capable of doing things on you own, plus none of us can really understand each other’s experiences, but after that conversation a while ago I was wondering if you wanted to try cooking.”

“Are you sure?” 

“Absolutely.” 

“I’m going to be completely honest. I'm only good at questionable bonfire cooking.”

Sanji laughed, offering a hand out to help Usopp down from the counter. 

“Here we’ll start simple, yeah?”

“If this turns into a disaster I’m assuming no responsibility, that’s all on you.” 

“Noted.” Sanji grinned, tugging Usopp towards the free counter to work. 

“Since it’s comfort food night, let's start with mashed potatoes. Think you’ll be able to peel them without cutting yourself?” 

“I make no promises,” 

“Alright, the only way to know is to try.”

“Do or do not, there is no try,” Usopp said sagely eyeing the mountain of potatoes. They looked like a blur so he tentatively ran his fingers over their skin. 

“Promise not to laugh?”

“About what?”

“Yes or no Sanji,”

“Alright, I promise,”

“They smell like dirt.” 

Sanji fought the urge to laugh, eyes watering turning away from Usopp. 

“You promised.” 

“I’m not laughing. I’m not,” He held up his hands in his defense, but his voice was light and airy. Definitely laughing.  Usopp made a face. Sounded suspicious.

Sanji was somehow multitasking, teaching Usopp how to cook while also cooking with multiple burners and the oven. 

“You make it look easy,” 

“Pssh, please, I’ve been cooking since I was a kid, I’ve had years of practice. It’s like you with your shooting.” 

“I didn't think of it that way,” Usopp said, while drying his now washed potatoes. 

He heard Sanji switch off a burner with a click, before moving the pan aside to cool. He turned to face Usopp, handing him a strange looking device. He’d chosen to hand him a peeler rather than a knife for this task, he said that Usopp could work his way up to a knife. Sanji had also politely handled Usopp’s curiosity. The sniper had a habit of tracing things to learn their shape and structure. Sanji had said even though it’s different, it’s still just as sharp as a knife. The way he handled the interaction wasn’t condescending at all. He merely helped Usopp, holding his hands in his for the first potato, and hovered for the next two before deciding that Usopp could handle himself. 

“You’re awfully trusting,” Usopp said, squinting at the potato despite it not doing anything. 

“I prefer hopefully optimistic.” 

“Thinly veiled attempt at avoiding the word nervous,”

“On the contrary, I’m excited.” 

Usopp paused his peeling.

  
  
“Excited?”

“I love cooking and it’s exciting to share the experience.” 

“Oh,” Usopp said, looking back down at the potato in his hand, bashful.

“How are you so good at fishing?” Sanji felt himself asking. 

“Huh?” Usopp said, blinking. “Practice I guess.” 

Sanji hummed waiting for him to elaborate. 

“You have no idea how many times poor Kaya had to dig fish hooks out of my hands,”

“Ow,”

“Much, Ow.” Usopp quipped. “My habit of tracing things with my hands is a blessing and a curse.”

“Yikes,” Sanji had decided on. He took the peeled scraps of the potatoes from Usopp and brought them to the other counter to work with. 

“I like being able to feel the world around me. I rely a lot on my other senses to experience things.”

“That's pretty cool, I read a book about a food critic who experienced taste as something visual. There was supposedly an overlap between his senses so it was heightened. I think I understand it to a point. Food is an experience.”

“That sounds so cool. Mildly terrifying if it starts out of the blue but, really cool,” 

“Right? I found out Zeff had actually served him before and had observed him while he explained the correlations. It-” Sanji paused what he was doing to walk back over to Usopp. He handed him another utensil and told him to mash the potatoes. Just like peeling, Sanji guided him, and finished by talking him through it. 

“It was an interesting concept to me.” He finished. 

“I’ve heard about that with music. There are supposedly some artists who are so good you can experience their music through your other senses.”

“I wonder if we’ll get a musician like that?” 

Usopp laughed, “Probably. Luffy is really hung up on wanting a musician.” 

Usopp had made it a habit to spend time in the kitchen with Sanji. The longer their journey went on the more he was starting to understand their cook. Sanji had this child-like wonder about certain things and Usopp was incredibly thankful that Luffy had convinced him to sign on as their cook. 

“Hey, I was wondering, how are you comfortable with swimming?” 

They’d docked at an island with nothing but wildlife, which was terrified of them. Usopp didn't blame them. Sanji had already finished his challenge with Zoro about finding the biggest or most of whatever game was on the island. 

“Oh, it’s easier if I’m at the surface. I can see the boat, but if I go too deep underwater or stray too far then I start to panic. I had a near drowning experience when I was little because I had spent too long underwater without marking the surface. I got too careless, and I almost died because of it,” Usopp said, staring at the waves. 

“That’s terrifying,” Sanji agreed. 

“It’s also why I never go alone. I always have someone with me.”

“The buddy system,” Sanji smiled, before adding, “The ocean is a powerful thing. I was always taught to respect it.”

“Smart.” Usopp said. 

“Want to swim?”

“Huh?”

“Want to go swimming? It’s late I know but I wanted to know if you wanted to swim with me.”

Usopp laughed, kicking off his shoes, his shirt already in the sand beside him. 

“Lead the way.” 

He followed Sanji to the water, the late afternoon sun warming the water to pleasant. He grinned as he watched Sanji submerge himself. He surfaced, shaking his hair out like a wet dog. 

“Oi,” Usopp laughed, wading out to where the cook was. 

“It's been too long since I swam.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“I mean I’m not counting when I’ve had to fish Luffy or Chopper out of the water. I swear devil fruit users think they're invincible sometimes.”

“Tell me about it. I really don't understand the appeal.”

“There’s not a single devil fruit you wouldn’t want?” 

“I’m not really sure, but I like being able to swim more. Part of me wonders if theres a devil fruit that gives you the ability to be water. But if that happened how would you use it? I mean water weakens devil fruit users."

Sanji felt himself laugh. Only Usopp with his infinite imagination would construct an idea like that. 

"I don't know, sounds pretty contradictory to me," He said. “I think that devil fruits are a waste. There's only one devil fruit I’d ever consider eating,” Sanji mused, swimming farther out. Usopp followed behind. 

“The one that turns you invisible, the suke-suke no mi,” 

“For what purpose though?”

“It's cool. Think of all the things you could do. The possibilities are endless.”

Usopp just stared flatly at him. Before he could respond something shot out of the water between them. Usopp tried not to panic, tried to reign in the calmness he needed to effectively use his Haki. The creature had sprayed water everywhere, causing him to swallow some. He coughed and kicked to stay afloat. 

“Usopp!” he heard Sanji should.

The creature had distubed the sea around them, the waves growing and crashing against him. 

“Usopp turn to your right,” Sanji hollered. Usopp trusted his friend and the waves broke on his shoulders rather than his face. 

“Take three strokes diagonally to your right, about two o’clock. And then swim straight forward, twelve o'clock, I’ll tell you when to stop.” 

Sanji’s voice was closer, the creature making a racket somewhere behind them. 

He heard a squeal, high pitch and in pain before the creature crashed back into the water. The waves tossing him around like a rag doll. 

“Oi, watch it Marimo,” Sanji shouted. 

Okay, so that meant Zoro had either pissed it off or finished it off. He preferred the latter. 

Sanji had caught up to him at this point. He could already tell that he was starting to panic and blame himself.

  
  
“I wish I could see how stupid that thing looked,” Usopp mused laughing as he followed Sanji’s directions to shore.

“How are you laughing that was terrifying I was afraid that-” 

“Sanji, trust me, that was nothing. A little disorienting but not nearly as bad as some things I’ve endured.”

“That’s not reassuring.” 

Usopp grinned as he let himself tread for a moment, jolting when he accidentally kicked something. The texture was too smooth to be a rock. 

He ignored Sanji’s question to dive down to inspect it. Things were even more blurry underwater but he found what he was looking for. He kicked to gain momentum before shimming the object out it’s space in the sand. 

He surfaced moments later, the sound of Sanji breaking the surface told him he was spooked. 

“Sorry I got distracted. I kicked it, what is it?” 

“It looks like a giant oyster. Please give me a bit of warning next time I thought you were in trouble.” Sanji said. 

“Sorry, I’ll try to warn you in the future,” He apologized, “Think it has a pearl?”

“Only one way to find out.”

“If there is, think Nami will forgive my debt,” 

“Not on your life,” Sanji laughed as they made it to shore. 

Usopp grunted as the weightlessness of the water gave way to the massive creature. 

“Wait there,” Sanji said, heading to the beach for something to pry it open with. 

He returned with Zoro in tow. 

“Don’t shatter it. We’re gonna eat it,” 

Usopp yelped when he heard Zoro unsheath his swords. 

“Oi, what a minute,” Usopp pleaded, but Zoro stepped up to the creature slicing along it’s sealed edge. 

“Holy shit, NAMI!” Sanji yelled, their Navigator racing to see them, the rest of the crew following suit. 

“Woah,”

“Woah, what?” Usopp said, still holding half the oyster. 

“There's so many pearls,” Robin said fascinated, running her hand over the delicate objects. 

“Who found this?” Nami asked. 

“Usopp did,” Sanji responded almost as quickly.

“Usopp, this is worth so much money,” Nami breathed. “Consider 60% of your debt forgiven.

“Only 60%?”

“65%, and if you ask again I’m doubling your interest.”

“65% is perfect thank you.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usopp's mashed potatoes were perfect in case anyone was wondering.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learning something new. Learning about himself and coming to terms with feelings. 
> 
> Strap in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna lie the end hurt to write.

“Hey Usopp?”

“Yeah?” 

“Can you tell time?”

“Tell time what?”

“Seriously?”

Usopp snickered. “Sorry.”

“No you aren’t,” Sanji huffed, “When we were swimming a couple of weeks ago I made references to a clock. I wanted to know if you knew what I meant by that. I’m not entirely sure if you see that the same way we do.” 

Usopp hummed in thought, shifting the sack of rice in his arms. 

“My dad taught me a little bit so that I could shoot but proper distances between them has always been a challenge.” 

“Oh, would you like to learn the distances?”

Usopp couldn’t help but laugh. “Please don’t jam a clock in my face is all I ask,”

“Why would I-”

“Hey, I’m speaking from experience, even if it’s on top of me I’m not gonna see it.”

“Who would-”

“One of the meaner old villagers who made it her personal goal in life to teach me through humility.”

“I’m so sorry,” Sanji said, outright horrified, though he knew Usopp couldn’t see his expression.

“Nah, it’s alright. It was years ago. I never let her see me cry so that’s a win. But she was right. It did build character.”

“What a spiteful old witch,”

“You can say that again.”

Sanji huffed, before coming to a stop in front of Usopp. He pushed the bags in his arms higher up. 

“Usopp, want to learn that now?”

“Learn what now? Humility, no thanks I’ll pass-”

“The clock orientation.” 

“You’re kidding right?” He said, shaking the sack of rice at Sanji. The cans in the bags at his arms clunking noisily. 

“I’m completely serious. It’s better to learn in a calm setting. Who knows when you’ll need to use it in a battle or something. You know how chaotic this crew is. We’re like a magnet for trouble.”

“Like calls to like,” Usopp mumbled. “But, I suppose you have a point.” 

“Great come on,” Sanji said, looping an arm around his and taking off in a sprint. 

“Wait Sanji!” 

“Nope,” He said laughing. 

Usopp felt clumsy as Sanji tugged him along. His boots kicking up dirt and rocking on the uneven ground. 

“What kind of street is this?” Usopp whisper yelled at the cook.

“It’s cobblestone.”

“Greeeat. If I break a leg you get to explain that one to Chopper.

Sanji came to an abrupt halt and Usopp crashed into his shoulder. 

“Ah, sorry,” He said, sounding semi-apologetic. 

“My nose,” Usopp whined, placing the rice on the ground. He could hear Sanji shuffling and the sound of objects being placed on the ground beside them. He surveyed their surroundings, the colors no longer blurring in motion. 

“Sanji?” Usopp began carefully, putting his arm out to the side, fingers extended. 

“Hmm?”

“Why are we in an alley?”

“It’s not- well actually, yeah, I guess it kind of is-”

Usopp made a face, pulling his arms back to himself and shivering.

“What’s with that expression?”  
  


“I don’t know about you mister ero-cook, but even being blind, I know shady stuff goes down in alleys.”

Sanji laughed. The sound booming, and echoing off the buildings. Usopp startled. 

“Oh that’s adorable. It’s not that kind of alley. It’s an apartment complex, the buildings share a small courtyard space, that's where we are.”

“I don’t care, I'm still taking a long ass shower when we get back to the ship.”

“Sure, fine,” He said dismissively, but helped ease the other bags Usopp had been carrying to the ground. 

“So I’m sure you know that clocks, particularly analog clocks are round.”

“Yes, thank you captain obvious,” 

Sanji ignored him, moving closer. “Can you put your right arm out? I’m going to move it to different positions?”

“What do you mean?”

“Just, trust me Usopp,” He said softly, gently moving Usopp’s arm while keeping his shoulders straight ahead.

“This is twelve o’clock,” Sanji said. Usopp’s arm was directly in front of him. He moves Usopp’s arm about thirty degrees to his right. 

“The clock is divided into twelve hours. You can think of it like cutting a slice of pie or cake. Each section is about thirty degrees.” 

Sanji moved Usopp’s arm back to twelve o’clock. Then slowly moved it thirty degrees to one o’clock. 

“This is one o’clock,” Sanji said, deciding to move Usopp’s hand down. It brushed against the inner third of his right thigh. Sanji was giving him physical reference points. 

“Twelve o’clock would slice you in half through the front side of your body. One hit’s about the first third of your thigh. Two o’clock,” Sanji said, lifting Usopp’s arm out and about sixty degrees from where he started at twelve, “This hits at the second third of your thigh.”

Sanji brought Usopp’s arm down so he could feel it. “Three o’clock is ninety degrees, it cuts you in half, from the middle of your body on the right side.” He moved Usopp’s arm again. 

“Four o’clock hist the first third of the back of your right thigh.” Sanji shifted, careful of Usopp’s shoulder flexibility. 

“I’m not going to force your arms backwards this far, but just like on the front of your right thigh, that second third on the back of your right thigh, that is about five o’clock. Six o’clock is opposite to twelve o’clock. That cuts you in half, dividing left and right, but from the back.”

Usopp nodded and Sanji continued. 

“Just like on the right. That second third of your back left thigh, that’s about seven o’clock. Hold your left arm out.” 

Usopp held his left arm out, Sanji repeated what he’d done before. 

“Eight o’clock hit’s that outer third of your thigh,” He moved Usopp’s arm back to his thigh to reference it.

“Nine o’clock is ninety degrees from both twelve and six, just like your three was. This hits the side of your thigh, and if you were to slice yourself open, it would cut you in half between front and back.”

He moves Usopp's arm again, “This is ten o’clock. This is the first, outer, third of the front of your left thigh.” Sanji moved his arm to his thigh before holding it back up at ten. 

“This is eleven o’clock, this hit’s the inner third of your left thigh,” Sanji moved Usopp’s arm again. 

“Then you end up back at twelve o’clock.” He said, letting Usopp’s arm drop. 

“Clockwise, the numbers go from low to high, getting bigger as you turn. This is turning from your right,” He moved Usopp’s arm to the right, tracing through the previous slices of time. 

“The opposite is counter-clockwise.” He began, taking Usopp’s left hand and placing it at twelve. “Counter-clockwise, the numbers get smaller. You’re going from the front, left towards your back,” he pushed Usopp’s arm towards his six. “Does that make sense?” 

“Yeah, it seems pretty self explanatory.” Usopp decided. He was actively practicing in his head to commit the numbers and their corresponding anchors to his mind. 

“Great, quiz time,”

Usopp floundered. 

“What now?”

“Quiz,”

Usopp didn’t need to look at the cook to know he was grinning like a mad man. 

“Why?”

“Well it only makes sense. The only way is to practice right. It’ll be easy, you’re pretty smart Usopp.”

He grumbled placing his arms at his sides. 

“Twelve o’clock” Sanji said. 

Usopp moved his right arm in front of him. 

“Great.” Sanji sounded thrilled. “Now six o’clock,”

Usopp moved so his left arm was perfectly behind him, twisting into the motion to reach.

“Perfect, now one o’clock.”

Usopp grumbled and shifted his right arm to one. 

“Really, you couldn’t have just done twelve, three, six and nine in a row?”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“Fun for me,” Usopp huffed. 

“It’s better to test your knowledge in a pattern that differs from that of what’s expected.” 

“What are you a teacher?” 

Sanji lightly kicked his ankle. 

“Oi!” 

“Shut up smart ass, eight o’clock.” 

Usopp moved his left arm behind him to eight. 

“Wonderful, now turn clockwise from eleven to five o’clock.” 

Usopp just stared at him. 

“You’re kidding,”

“Nope.” Sanji said, popping the ‘p’ sound. He was obviously enjoying this. 

Usopp bit back the urge to scream, but moved his right arm to eleven brows furrowed. It was different with the right arm but he checked with the anchor point on his thigh to make sure he had it. He didn’t notice the look of undiluted awe from Sanji. 

Usopp moved his arm from eleven to five. 

“That was excellent.” 

“What are you a thesaurus?”

Sanji laughed. 

“I mean seriously, how many words for good are you going to go through?” 

“As many as it takes.”

Usopp made a face. 

“Well, try this. Take a step to your three, then take two steps to your ten.” 

Usopp threw his arms out to balance out of habit.

He took a cautious step to his right, then two diagonally forward to his left where his ten was. 

“You know I chose a spot with no obstacles right, I won’t let you trip or anything.”

“Sanji, I trip over my own feet on a daily basis,”

He heard the cook laugh. “Turn counter clockwise from two until four. Then take two steps to your one.” 

Sanji watched as Usopp moved his left arm from its two anchor point until his four anchor, orienting his body to turn. He shuffled stepped his way to face his previous four, then paused.

“That didn’t feel right.” 

“It was right, but now you need to take two steps to your one.”

“Which one?”

Sanji thought for a moment before stepping next to him. 

“The anchor points never change just your orientation in space. It’s like when you turn a mug on the table. The handle can move so it sticks out to the left or the right, but it never changes where it’s connected on the mug,”

“Okay?”

“So, what that means, is even though you’ve turned, your one is still in the same place. You’ve turned so you aren’t facing the same direction, but the anchors, the time slices never move.” 

“I think I get it.” Usopp said. The sniper fought the blush working its way to his cheeks. This was closer than he had thought this lesson would be. He was almost certain he’d remember the feeling of Sanji’s calloused hands holding him like he was a scared dove. Or like he was touching the wing of a butterfly, soft but reassuring. 

“So take two steps to your one.” 

Usopp took two unsure steps. 

“Incredible.” 

“Last one, turn clockwise to your three, with your whole body, not just turning your torso. It’s like dancing, your feet point in the direction you want to travel. Take three steps to your four, five steps to your nine, and seven steps to your two.”

He watched Usopp roll his shoulders as he followed the directions to a ‘T’. 

“Congratulations Usopp, that was awesome! I’m so proud of you,” Sanji said sweeping the sniper off his feet in a crushing hug. It was unexpected but Usopp realized he didn’t mind the lack of warning. 

The cook realized what he did, apologizing profusely as he placed the sniper on his feet again. 

“You’re a quick learner,” Sanji said, eyeing Usopp as they gathered up the supplies Nami had sent them out for. They were planning to take a trip to the island of gold or something and had to stock up. 

“I call it stubborn.” 

“Hey whatever works,” Sanji laughed. “The ship is directly ahead to our two. Think you can stay on that track?”

“Please, I got this Sanji,” Usopp said confidently. 

“I think it’s cute.” 

“Think what’s cute?” Usopp asked Robin from their place on the blindingly white beach. Chopper had instructed him to keep his goggles or glasses on at all times because of the intensity of the white light. 

“You and cook-san.” 

“Ummm” He squeaked. 

“You two are very close, and he seems to have been trying to teach you things you might not know, things a lot of sighted people take for granted.”

“How do you figure?” He said carefully. 

“Well even if you can’t read an analog clock, most sighted people are able to orient themselves in those directions. There are of course exceptions but in general that's the case.”

“You know about that?”

“You two aren’t subtle. I’ve noticed when he’s helping you on islands or instructing you to retrieve something when you help in the kitchen he uses those directions and has even helped you build a map of height and width within that orientation.” 

“Oh,” He said dumbly. 

“It’s nice to see you both so happy. I know life hasn’t been all that kind to any of us, but I’m happy you two have each other.”

“Robin, that’s nice and all but we aren’t?”

“Aren’t what?”

Usopp flapped his hands, mouth gaping as he searched for the words. 

She huffed a laugh, “That you aren’t together?”

“Yes,” he said vehemently. 

“Aren’t you though?” 

_Gee thanks Robin_ , that’s not cryptic at all, Usopp thought to himself. He didn’t need to see her to know the gleam in her eye. 

“No,”

“Not yet,” She mused, turning the page in her old book. 

“What’s that mean, not yet?” Usopp demanded.

“I'll tell you when you’re older.” She grinned. 

Usopp screeched, stomping off towards Zoro. The shivering forms of the white berets, as they called themselves, creeping in on them. 

“Do they know that they’re not good at hiding?”

“No, I don’t think so,” Zoro chuckled as he stared at the approaching forms. 

“You good? You seem kinda mad,” Zoro said, glancing at Usopp. 

“Robin was being cryptic again.”

“Figures,” 

Usopp found himself muttering his time old phrase, as he, Sanji and Luffy entered the tunnel, choosing their ordeals. Luffy had thought it was the perfect time to state that maybe one of the ordeals was a loser that would drop them back to their sea was very unappreciated. Even Sanji seemed put off by the thought. He had felt his heart in his mouth as they plummeted to their ordeal, screaming all the while. 

They’d chosen the ordeal of Balls in the hopes that it would be the least violent. He belatedly wondered if they would have fared any better with the other ordeals. He never realized how much those clock lessons would actually pay off. Sanji had been calling out directions to him in the hopes that he could get to their boat. He was thankful for all the additional practice since before Jaya. 

Usopp launched himself towards the boat, hoping that he’d be within the correct vicinity. They needed to get to the boat to save the others from being sacrificed to the island’s God. 

He could hear Luffy cheering and heard Sanji telling him to get ready to jump. The waterways here on Sky Island were terrifying. They seemed thin from a distance, but one on the waterway, it was deceptively deep. He had a small knife in hand ready to cut the line, this particular device was reserved for cleaning Merry, and had a safety which made it so he wouldn’t topple into the water. He knows he’s gotten better, he’s learned a lot. Unfortunately his Haki is useless since it only senses living energies at the moment. One day he’d like to be in tune enough with his surroundings to be able to predict movements. He’d add that to his never ending to-do list if he survived this trip. 

“Now!” Sanji yelled, there was a distant explosion and he heard Luffy shout. 

Usopp closed his eyes, urging himself to be brave and he fell. 

“You guys, it was so cool!” Luffy cheered, arm wrapped around Usopp’s neck. 

“The ball guy was weird, but Usopp saved us, he got the boat and even helped us take him down! He hit him from so far away!” Luffy said animatedly. 

“It was really cool, we owe you one Usopp,” Sanji said. 

“Hey if it weren’t for your directions I never would have made it to the boat.” He said. 

“Not the point, you did that Usopp!” He cheered. 

They’d been filled in on the current situation and Usopp couldn’t help but wonder how much this would weigh on them. From the way Chopper reacted, and his overall quietness there was something bothering the little reindeer. 

“Hey, Chopper?” Usopp said. He'd become slightly more attuned to which presence was aboard the ship while using his Haki. Which made finding their doctor easier. 

“I’m so sorry,” Chopper sobbed, throwing himself against Usopp. 

It startled him and he took a step back to prevent them from falling. “Sorry about what?”

“The Merry she-”

“Chopper are you hurt?” 

“Huh?”

“Are you hurt?”   
  


Chopper shook his head, making a sound. 

“That’s good then,” Usopp said hugging him closer. The way Chopper tensed against him told him that wasn’t the reaction their doctor was expecting. 

“I’m glad you’re not hurt, Chopper,” He said firmly, rubbing soothing circles in his back. “I’m sure Merry will be fine, just some more wood, some metal and some nails and she’ll be good as new,”

“Usopp,” Chopper sobbed. 

It hurt a little, to realize that Chopper had thought he cared more about the boat than him. It did. He knew that he had a bit of an obsession with the ship, but it was his last tie to life back home. It was comfortable, and safe. He knew his way around the Merry.

“Chopper I want you to know that I care about you. I’ve even started to think of you as a little brother. One that has no right to be infinitely smarter than I am, but believe me when I say I’m glad you’re okay. You’re pretty brave. I don’t think I would have fought anywhere near as valiantly as you. You’ll have to tell me how you did that. You also smell a little crispy so I want you to take a break. I’ll stay with you if you want.”

Chopper nodded into his stomach. 

“I’ll even see if Sanji can make something sweet. I think after holding your own against a priest you more than deserve it. Hell, Luffy, Sanji and I had everything we could do to take down one, and you did it on your own.”

“But the Sky knight-”

“Semantics, take credit where credit is due,” Usopp said, shuffling them towards the kitchen. 

Usopp cursed Sanji six ways from Sunday as he clung to the rope for dear life. Sure, he knew wasn’t as physically strong as the others. He had definitely put on some muscle on their journey but he was in no way prepared to have to use the newly prepared “Usopp Invention'' to hook them to the ship. Just like in his fight with Satori, the belt had a locking mechanism which would prevent him from plummeting to his inevitable demise. Sanji barked at him to hurry up. 

“Go on an adventure they said, it’ll be fun they said.” He grumbled, his arms shaking as he pulled himself up. 

“Be brave Usopp,” He hissed, cursing the rope burn as he slipped. 

“You know!” He yelled up at Sanji, “This isn’t what I mean when I said I’m just as capable as you.”

“Be thankful you can’t see the drop then,” 

“OH PERFECT! BEST THING YOU’VE SAID ALL DAY SAN-” He broke off into a scream when the rope swayed.

“Shut up, Enel will hear you! We have to get Nami!”

“Nami is a strong and independent woman, she doesn’t need us,” Usopp tried, barely containing a shout as the rope jerked. 

“A gentleman never abandons a damsel in distress.”

“If you haven’t noticed, while I’m certainly no damsel, I’M PASSED THE POINT OF DISTRESS HERE SANJI!”

“Almost there.” 

“That’s not helping,” Usopp bit out. His arms felt like jelly. He hadn’t fully recovered from the lightning attack earlier. His poor heart couldn’t handle this crew sometimes. 

“I’m up, there’s a weird ledge so I’ll pull you up, hold on.”

Usopp bit the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming as Sanji hauled him up at the speed of light.

“See, perfectly capable and fine.”

“Tell that to my permanent state of anxiety and new concussion.”

“You’ll live.”

“You don’t know that, what if my ‘I-need-to-avoid-psychopaths-or-I’ll-die disease acts up,” Usopp glowered. “It’s fatal, Chopper even said so,”

“Blasphemy”

Usopp does a dramatic role play of fainting, final words worth of one of those shows Luffy somehow finds on their poor Den-den Mushi. 

Sanji swore, dropping to knee to prevent Usopp’s skull from slamming into the deck. 

“Hey!”

He sounds a bit remorseful, but not enough, so Usopp wasn’t done yet. 

“Oh, Sanji,” He began, voice a high falsetto, punctuating it with a couple of coughs for effect. “Tell-” 

This close he could feel Sanji trembling.

“Tell Zoro,” 

“Yes?” He urged. 

“Tell Zoro that I was the one that put the hair dye in the shampoo,” Usopp choked, lolling his head to the side, arm dropping to the deck to catch himself as Sanji burst into a fit of giggles.

“You did that?’

“I did,” Usopp laughed. A few weeks ago he’d lost a bet with Nami and had reluctantly taken the tube of hair dye. He had no idea what color it was but when Zoro emerged from the bathroom with neon magenta hair the entire crew couldn’t keep it together. 

Sure Usopp was terrified that Zoro would realize it was him, especially after he cracked a joke about nothing being off when asked. Zoro had actually asked Usopp if his hair was still the same color, only to whack him with the sheaths of his swords when he realized what he’d done.

Nami had taken 7% off his debt just for pulling it off so splendidly. 

Usopp felt his heart leap to his throat as he slammed open the door. He was fully prepared for a Sanji versus Enel beatdown. Instead, he was the first to arrive and he was beyond thankful he couldn’t actually see the guy. It took some of the pressure off him. He had never really thought about encountering others who relied on Haki, but Enel had such an advanced form of observation haki. He assumed that they must have registered about as much as ants based on his reaction. 

  
He was sure he’d never stop smelling like barbeque after being electrocuted, again, but while he was on the cusp of consciousness, he allowed himself to observe Enel. The man was certainly no god, but the Haki acuity certainly felt god-tier. 

Usopp found himself doubting his path. Sure he eventually wanted to reach that level of observation. It was fights like these that humbled him. That fed that pit of despair and anxiety. He felt useless, worthless, helpless. He could do nothing of the caliber of some of his crew. Growing up his dad had told him not to compare himself to others. He said it was because everyone is different, and no one is the same, which makes the basis of comparison unfair. It also had to do with Usopp being disadvantaged in some regards. However, living day to day in a crew this strong, with this many personalities. He found it hard to believe if he was really meant to stand alongside them. 

Their run in with Aokiji had been jarring. Robin had mentioned a run in with the guy in the past but that did little to prepare the rest of them for just how powerful an admiral could be. They knew that it took a lot to freak Robin out. She was as steady as a mountain, unyielding. To feel her break down and lose herself as much as she did was terrifying. It had anxiety climbing high. The admiral had frozen Robin solid, and Luffy had challenged him after he’d harmed his crew. Luffy didn’t end up much better off. Usopp had run with Chopper to the ship to try to warm Robin. To see Chopper at such a loss was heartbreaking. Chopper had seen frostbite before but never actually a human frozen solid. 

Luffy tried to make a joke of it, after the fact to lighten the mood, but everyone was still perturbed. The frog that had sunken that ship showed up while they were on their way to the next island, capturing everyones attention. 

There was a sound which almost sounded like an alarm. Usopp didn’t have time to question it before they veered Merry out of the way of a speeding ship. It was loud and fast, and left Merry rocking in its wake. 

Usopp had long since grown accustomed to the natural sway of being aboard Merry, he had long since grown accustomed to the shifts when the weather turned. It was a new sensation and that was when he felt it. 

Relying on other senses had been something he often did unintentionally. Merry groaned as she steadied herself. The rest of the crew attended to different things, likely trying to figure out what happened to the frog, but not Usopp. He couldn’t. He ran his hands along her railing, tears gathered in his eyes. 

He took a deep breath, taking long slow sweeps of the ship committing it to memory. When he finally made his way below deck he let the tears fall. He’d mastered this particular skill as a child, the art of silent crying. He sat on the floor, hands resting on the planks above the keel. 

“Merry,” He whispered solemnly. 

He could hear the whoops and hollers from those above deck, like that they had a destination in mind. He couldn’t share their sentiment. Not when he could feel Merry slipping through his fingers like grains of sand. 

He had a feeling he knew what would be in store for them if they encountered a shipwright. Merry was living on borrowed time. She cared about them as much as they cared for her. She was just as much a crew member as they were. 

Usopp let Nami steer the Yagara. He didn’t dare try to navigate the foreign city. Zoro had stayed with the ship to avoid what was bound to be disastrous. Usopp could also feel the guilt radiating off him after Merry’s mast let go. It didn’t help that Zoro had a natural brute strength to his grip. Usopp could have sworn he heard a fond laugh, but he's convinced himself it was just in his head. He knew that he likely only came along because of how much Merry had meant to him. 

The appraiser had tried to short change them, and Usopp was again reminded how terrifying Nami could be if provoked. It helped that she took her duty as the ship’s treasurer so seriously. Granted she was self-appointed, but they’d all agreed she was the best fit for the position. Usopp was still laughing as they headed to find Iceberg. The old lady had given them a letter to give to this Iceberg guy, likely to vouch for them and to tell him that their ship was in dire need of repairs. 

Usopp bit the inside of his cheek when so many unfamiliar blobs of color lumbered past. The shipwrights worked diligently, and took their craftsmanship seriously. He'd been handed two of the three briefcases before protesting. He had pawned the other briefcase off to Nami. She had apologized for making him carry one, but said it was less suspicious. He was given orders to not let it go. 

He squinted ahead trying to follow along. He faintly registered something though it was unconscious. He mistimed it, only just. Nami didn’t kick him, not as often as Luffy or Sanji, and usually if she did it was knee height or lower. The crew knew enough not to touch his face. 

He rubbed his cheek, and prodded his nose, staring blankly ahead. Iceberg made a sound, and there was some muffled speaking. He tried to keep a hold of the briefcase, slipping it under his foot until he regained his bearings. 

He quickly came to the conclusion that Waters 7 was his most formidable adversary yet. Not only did he run the risk of toppling underwater at any wrong turn, but the city was a labyrinth. All the streets wound around the island, none of them flowing naturally. Counting to retrace his steps would be impossible, he'd have just as much luck finding their bulls. It seemed like everything was against him. He didn’t bite back on his scream as a hand clapped itself over his mouth. He thrashed, kicking against his captors, and did something incredibly stupid. Usopp kicked the briefcase in the last direction he’d seen Nami, as hard as he could. 

He hoped that they wouldn’t notice they never swapped their bag if he put up a fight. They had the benefit of surprise and there were at least two of them. He tried everything in the book that would warrant drawing attention to them. The bandits certainly put up a fight of their own. He had no idea what the others were doing, how they were handling things, he grunted as they got a decent hold of him. The lead punch to the gut that followed had him choking on his inhale. His insides quivered in protest. He let out a wheezing rasp as someone landed a punch to his side. The impact definitely broke a rib or two. He stumbled and they took to kicking him, throwing punches into the fray when they could. 

Usopp heard them leave, could hear the panicked shout from the crowd that had started to form. He retreated into himself. It was easier that way. To internalize things. He let himself think the worst. He had no idea if they got the money they wanted. 

The clack of familiar heels hit the stone streets, he blinked through his tears. It’s not like he would have seen her anyway but crying always made his eyes sting and his face turn puffy. His nose was bent at an unnatural angle, his body protesting even his breathing. Everything hurt. He had been involved in fight after fight, and his body was still recovering from Skypeia. He had been wrapped head to toe in bandages in Alabasta. He tried to tell himself this was normal.

He couldn’t help but let out a bitter laugh as he remarked on the similarities between him and the Merry. She at least had an excuse. She was more useful to them too. He had no idea if the crew would ever voice that he was their weak link. 

Thinking like that hurt. So he let himself be cradled by Nami as she frantically spoke to him, begging him to wake up, to be okay. She was shaking, the movement sending wave after white hot wave of pain through his body. 

“I can’t face everyone,” He said weakly. He could feel blood oozing from cuts he didn’t remember receiving. 

He heard her sharp intake. He assumed that they had gotten the money after all.

“We were about to get Merry repaired,” He whispered hoarsely. His voice was weak, it sounded as pitiful as he felt. After everything he still couldn’t do anything right. 

He failed. He wanted to finally prove to the crew that he was worth their time, worth their effort. He missed the mark, he was a failure. 

“I feel so ashamed,” His voice broke, as he dissolved into a new wave of tears. 

Nami told him to hang on, to not move. He knew she went to go to find help, but Usopp felt his heart crack. The crushing weight of keeping up with all of them, with their progress. He felt that like a boulder upon his chest. He felt that weight with every breath. He felt that divide pushing them apart. 

Sanji wanted to kick Zoro over the side of the ship for being lousy at his watch job. He couldn’t help the guilt gnawing at him when he learned that several strangers had boarded their ship. The Franky Pirates ro something. A shipwright had been there too, delivering that crushing blow. 

Zoro had said that the Shipwright explained Merry’s pain. Unlike humans, their pain only accumulates. It’s not easy to recover form. 

“Thats hard to swallow, what's Usopp gonna say when he hears?”

He let his fingers trace the railing. He’d been on several ships, but had never truly appreciated any of them. Not like Merry who’d been there with them from the start. She was their Nakama too. They’d only ever added members to their crew, the thought of having to let one of them go left a sour taste in his mouth. He hurriedly flicked his lighter, choosing now to smoke. He could feel the anxiety building. He knew Merry meant a lot to all of them, most of all Usopp. He knew that their sniper had a special connection with the ship. The Merry had been mostly held together through his sheer stubbornness. He wondered if she would be sad to part with them. If she knew that they all cared for her. 

When Nami showed up, out of breath and tears streaming down her face Sanji knew it was just the start of something terrible. He didn’t fully understand how awful things were about to turn. Not even close. 

“Usopp,” Nami cried. They took off in a sprint, racing towards where she’d left him. 

  
  
  


Sanji felt the bile rising in his throat as they neared the spot where Usopp was supposed to be. Nami had told him to stay. The dark ruddy stains on the pake gray streets told them he’d ignored her protests. She had told him to just let the money go. That he meant more to them than the money did but Sanji knew what the brain was capable of. If there was even the smallest kernel of doubt, anxiety would find a way. 

He cursed, glaring at the watery streets, too peaceful for their mood. 

First Robin, then Merry. Now Usopp. 

He bit clean through the filter. 

“Damn it,” He cursed, Zoro muttering his agreement. 

Chopper looked ready to explode. He was their doctor, and his friend was injured. Badly. 

Usopp knew going into this that it was a losing battle. He told himself to be brave. That he was ready for what the Franky Family would throw at him. He knew he’d be outnumbered, but somewhere deep down he told himself that if he could take them on, he could prove his worth to the crew. He wasn’t like them. He was already at a disadvantage. Not nearly on par with the rest of them. He knew things would only be more challenging. So he decided if he was able to hold his own against the Franky Family he would stay, if not he’d do what his mind has been nagging at him since that day in Syrup. 

As he stormed the house he knew that he’d be defeated. His haki had alerted him to the sheer number of the franky family. Some blips were larger than others. 

“Give it back,” He roared, his body protesting. He had to try. His father had once said you can’t improve unless you give it your all. 

He was giving it his all. 

Sanji stared at the battered form in front of the Franky house. Usopp was so bloody and broken he was barely recognizable. 

He knew the others were as furious as he was. No furious didn’t even begin to cover how mad he was. Usopp had tried to fight for them, for Merry. It was their turn to fight for him. 

He saw Luffy tilt his hat, Zoro tying his bandana, Chopper huffing as he transformed. Sanji lit a cigarette and decided it was time to raise some hell. 

No one hurt their friends. 

No one. 

When Usopp came too he knew exactly where he was. He hated himself for it. For being too weak, for not being able to hold his own. For being a burden to the rest of them.

He knew before anyone spoke what the news about Merry was. He knew but it didn’t make it any easier to accept. Merry was just like him, broken. It was only natural they cut loose the dead weights. That they continue on unhindered. 

They lectured him, on his recklessness. He was too numb to care. He’d already decided. He had to be brave if he was going to do it. They were his friends, but Usopp had learned friends come and go like the tide. 

He never kept friends for too long, he only got in their way after a while. Kaya was the only one who ever stayed. He figured it was because she knew, maybe deep down she had felt the same way about people. Two sick kids who understood each other. Sometimes they didn’t even need words, they just knew how to comfort and support one another. 

The only thing that didn’t fit the pattern was Luffy. The Captain knew him, knew of his disabilities and still sought him out. Befriended him and treated him like an equal despite there being no comparisons of their strengths. 

Luffy had been positive, after the Franky incident which told Usopp everything he needed to know. Luffy had finally cracked. He was trying to protect Usopp, to dampen the blow on the news. 

He could tell just how much the rubber Captain was going out of his way not to tell him, and not to blame him. Usopp may be blind but he wasn’t stupid. He could tell by the way everyone else was tense. 

Luffy had declared that he’d made a decision about Merry. Usopp didn't like it, but even he knew. He hadn’t heard the actual damage and part of him was thankful for that. Part of him was relieved to not know. That, unfortunately, left room for doubt and scepticism. 

Usopp tried to play dumb, to diffuse the thense mood, reacting how they expected him to. That he’d think they were joking, that there was nothing, couldn’t be anything wrong with Merry. He needed to provoke them. He needed to make a scene because then they’d let him leave. 

He needed them to be the ones to cut him loose. 

Usopp prided himself on being able to read people. He’s learned to act and respond differently based on how people interact with him. He cast his haki out, pleading that his plan would work. He needed to focus. He needed to hone in on those emotions. He rarely used this side of his Haki, and never in this context, but he was desperate. 

He could tell, Luffy was nearing his breaking point. He knew that even Luffy could be angered. 

“You’re not a shipwright are you, Usopp?” Luffy yelled, voice laced with frustration. 

“You’re right,” He laughed, the sound hollow, “I’m not,” Usopp said his fingers crinckling the papers on the table. He forced himself to stand. Part of him wished that they’d tell him to stay. Beg him to come back. 

“Oi, Luffy,” Nami yelled, distressed. 

Usopp pushed he needed it to escalate. Words were also weapons. 

“Fine! You don’t like my decision, get off my-” 

The dull crack of wood echoed throughout the cabin. Sanji was panting, chest heaving as he stared at Luffy, leg coming back to rest on the floor. He had tears lining his eyes. Nami was shaking, tears slipping silently down her face. The cabin fell silent, quiet enough to hear a pin drop. 

“Cut off one useless friend after another. First Merry. Who’s next?” He began, voice tight. “If that's how you feel then just get rid of me too.” He declared. 

Usopp felt the emotions rising, felt them swirling and spiking through his haki. 

“I’ve been thinking,” Usopp rasped, “I can't keep up with your monstrous strength. I’ll just end up causing you guys trouble. We don't have to travel together if we have different opinions.” He stood on shaky legs. He could at least save face and blame it on his injuries. He knew that this would be ugly. 

“Oi, Usopp, where are you going?” Sanji hollered, visibly upset. 

He hastily made his way out. The door slamming between him and his family. 

He felt Sanji, Nami and Chopper start after him. He was too far away to hear the rest of what was said between the crew but he told himself to keep putting one foot in front of the other. He heard the door open, people furiously charging across the deck.

“It’s true the ship belongs to you Captain, so fight me.” 

He knew he’d eat those words but Usopp had learned that it’s the people closest to you that know how to defeat you, that know how to hit you where it hurts. He was thankful he couldn’t see how heartbroken they were. It made it easier to rip off the metaphorical bandaid. 

“ _Be brave Usopp,_ ” He told himself as he made his way towards the island to prepare for his fight with Luffy. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is going to be looooooong.

**Author's Note:**

> This topic is a bit out of my comfort zone just because I want to do it justice, any feedback is more than appreciated 
> 
> I really hope that I've touched upon what it is like to be have such visual impairments. My goal is not to offend but rather see characters through a new lens. I've always wondered what would be different about the story if the characters had different experiences.  
> I really want to stress that ableism is a privilege and that just because some disabilities are hard to accept or understand doesn't mean that they don't exist. They're real, and people live with them every day.  
> Growing up I always wanted to see more representation so please if I'm in accurate with anything in this story please let me know. I'm going off of my research and things I've learned in class. I really want to capture the experience and do it justice.


End file.
